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Substance Abuse
Time to sell his car?
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<blockquote data-quote="Kathy813" data-source="post: 517178" data-attributes="member: 1967"><p>I often wondered that, too. One of my difficult child's best friends that was involved in some of the same bad things that difficult child did moved past it and is now a lawyer. Most of her other friends have moved on from difficult child as they grew up and started to lead productive lives.</p><p></p><p>difficult child's don't care because they are numbed by drugs and that takes the pain away. Of course, they realize that their former friends have moved on to successful lives and that just causes more pain and they take more drugs.</p><p></p><p>It is a vicious cycle and it will continue until something bad enough happens to make them want to change. Many of us had to kick our children out of the house knowing they would be homeless when we finally realized that we were just enabling their drug use. It is the hardest thing that I ever had to do.</p><p></p><p>I hate to say this but I seriously doubt your son will find a full time job or keep it very long even if he manages to find one. My difficult child kept stringing us along while she was "job hunting." The search lasted months on end.</p><p></p><p>At the very least, take the car away for anything but job hunting and make that contingent on being gone only 8am to 4pm (job hunting hours). Nowadays, many job listing are online and your difficult child many only need the car for going on interviews.</p><p></p><p>I know how desperately you want to believe that those rolling papers are "old" and that he is not doing drugs now. It's amazing what we parents can convince ourselves of to avoid the truth of our loved one's addictions. I still find myself wondering if I could have really "lost" the jewelry that disappeared when difficult child was living here. Even though I found some of it in her room, she still denies taking the missing bracelet and ring. I know in my heart of hearts that she took them and sold them for drug money . . . yet, I find myself thinking, "well maybe, just maybe, she is telling the truth on this one."</p><p></p><p>I guess it is a mother's love (or blindness) that makes it so hard for us to believe the worst.</p><p></p><p>{{{Hugs}}}</p><p></p><p>~Kathy</p><p></p><p>P.S. I did see your puppies. They are adorable!!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Kathy813, post: 517178, member: 1967"] I often wondered that, too. One of my difficult child's best friends that was involved in some of the same bad things that difficult child did moved past it and is now a lawyer. Most of her other friends have moved on from difficult child as they grew up and started to lead productive lives. difficult child's don't care because they are numbed by drugs and that takes the pain away. Of course, they realize that their former friends have moved on to successful lives and that just causes more pain and they take more drugs. It is a vicious cycle and it will continue until something bad enough happens to make them want to change. Many of us had to kick our children out of the house knowing they would be homeless when we finally realized that we were just enabling their drug use. It is the hardest thing that I ever had to do. I hate to say this but I seriously doubt your son will find a full time job or keep it very long even if he manages to find one. My difficult child kept stringing us along while she was "job hunting." The search lasted months on end. At the very least, take the car away for anything but job hunting and make that contingent on being gone only 8am to 4pm (job hunting hours). Nowadays, many job listing are online and your difficult child many only need the car for going on interviews. I know how desperately you want to believe that those rolling papers are "old" and that he is not doing drugs now. It's amazing what we parents can convince ourselves of to avoid the truth of our loved one's addictions. I still find myself wondering if I could have really "lost" the jewelry that disappeared when difficult child was living here. Even though I found some of it in her room, she still denies taking the missing bracelet and ring. I know in my heart of hearts that she took them and sold them for drug money . . . yet, I find myself thinking, "well maybe, just maybe, she is telling the truth on this one." I guess it is a mother's love (or blindness) that makes it so hard for us to believe the worst. {{{Hugs}}} ~Kathy P.S. I did see your puppies. They are adorable!! [/QUOTE]
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