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General Parenting
To Adopt or Not to Adopt---That is the question!
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 107768" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Welcome aboard. I do not have an answer to your question but I have had a few interesting experiences that tend to make me more prone than many to understand why you ask the question.</p><p></p><p>On a personal basis my husband and I took in our younger grandson on</p><p>and off over the years and finally permanently about five years</p><p>ago. He is doing quite well and our family is functioning. He</p><p>is ADHD, AS and probably a few more alphabet letters. The main</p><p>issue for me, however, is that the spontaneous joy has been sucked out of our home. As selfish as it sounds...I really do miss feeling relaxed. Life is much much better than it was. We</p><p>are hoping that he will lead a "normal" life as an adult. on the other hand</p><p>I understand your question AND I know it is heartfelt.</p><p></p><p>As a volunteer I worked with neglected and abused children for many years. The DCFS (formerly HRS) was determined to keep children together for foster/adopt placements. Many times I saw</p><p>emotionally healthy siblings legally bound to PTSD etc. siblings</p><p>and their futures diminished as the result of the chaos.</p><p></p><p>Has a neuro-psychological evaluation been done to ascertain the</p><p>depth of the problems? Are the children seeing a child psychiatrist in addition to a therapist? Are any medications being used</p><p>or suggested? In our case a very experienced Psychiatrist, once</p><p>located, was able to help us work it out.</p><p></p><p>Somedays I wish we had bowed out. Most days I accept that we did</p><p>what had to be done. Every day I wish life was better for all of</p><p>us. Good luck. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 107768, member: 35"] Welcome aboard. I do not have an answer to your question but I have had a few interesting experiences that tend to make me more prone than many to understand why you ask the question. On a personal basis my husband and I took in our younger grandson on and off over the years and finally permanently about five years ago. He is doing quite well and our family is functioning. He is ADHD, AS and probably a few more alphabet letters. The main issue for me, however, is that the spontaneous joy has been sucked out of our home. As selfish as it sounds...I really do miss feeling relaxed. Life is much much better than it was. We are hoping that he will lead a "normal" life as an adult. on the other hand I understand your question AND I know it is heartfelt. As a volunteer I worked with neglected and abused children for many years. The DCFS (formerly HRS) was determined to keep children together for foster/adopt placements. Many times I saw emotionally healthy siblings legally bound to PTSD etc. siblings and their futures diminished as the result of the chaos. Has a neuro-psychological evaluation been done to ascertain the depth of the problems? Are the children seeing a child psychiatrist in addition to a therapist? Are any medications being used or suggested? In our case a very experienced Psychiatrist, once located, was able to help us work it out. Somedays I wish we had bowed out. Most days I accept that we did what had to be done. Every day I wish life was better for all of us. Good luck. DDD [/QUOTE]
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To Adopt or Not to Adopt---That is the question!
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