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<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 645169" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>I am woman, hear me roar!!!!</p><p></p><p>:O)</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Here is the thing I know about those moms: They are filled with conflict, they haven't done every single thing right in their lives, and they don't have my sense of style. AND YET, their children don't hate them, or take drugs (to excess ~ remember that I have a friend who uses, or has used, cocaine on occasion), or run around self-destructing and blaming it on mom.</p><p></p><p><em>Some of them even have children who are policemen.</em></p><p></p><p>Here is a story. So, I was driving somewhere with my granddaughters when they were oh, say about eight and four. All of a sudden, the eight year old dives for the floor and the littlest one, stuck in her car seat, shrieks, "Grandma ~ it's the cops!"</p><p></p><p>Now...how did they learn that response? I tried to tell them the policeman is our friend. They both looked at me like I was trying to feed them poison.</p><p></p><p>***</p><p></p><p>And the mom who has confessed to having used cocaine in the past? Is the mother of the Yale professor I keep trying never to think about let alone mention the spoiled little brat's name.</p><p></p><p>Ahem.</p><p></p><p>I think she said it was Yale.</p><p></p><p>I was vomiting, at the time.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>I feel the same way, Albatross. Thank heaven we have one another to help us name and defend ourselves from our secret thoughts and self accusations.</p><p></p><p>Still, I remember when difficult child daughter was teaching and engaged and had the house and everything looked so impossibly bright? And difficult child son was working and happily engaged in raising his own son and things were looking pretty good there?</p><p></p><p>I was like, showing off every chance I got.</p><p></p><p>Which doesn't excuse those biatches for looking down on me just because one of my kids is an addict and the other is...is having the problems she is. (Numb silence descends, and Cedar is alone again, with the horror of what is....)</p><p></p><p>.</p><p></p><p>But here is the thing: It doesn't do any good to pretend that what is happening to us is not happening.</p><p></p><p>I do feel better about everything, though.</p><p></p><p>I just don't quite know how to separate myself, or how to think about all this.</p><p></p><p>I get the genetics piece.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 645169, member: 17461"] I am woman, hear me roar!!!! :O) Cedar Here is the thing I know about those moms: They are filled with conflict, they haven't done every single thing right in their lives, and they don't have my sense of style. AND YET, their children don't hate them, or take drugs (to excess ~ remember that I have a friend who uses, or has used, cocaine on occasion), or run around self-destructing and blaming it on mom. [I]Some of them even have children who are policemen.[/I] Here is a story. So, I was driving somewhere with my granddaughters when they were oh, say about eight and four. All of a sudden, the eight year old dives for the floor and the littlest one, stuck in her car seat, shrieks, "Grandma ~ it's the cops!" Now...how did they learn that response? I tried to tell them the policeman is our friend. They both looked at me like I was trying to feed them poison. *** And the mom who has confessed to having used cocaine in the past? Is the mother of the Yale professor I keep trying never to think about let alone mention the spoiled little brat's name. Ahem. I think she said it was Yale. I was vomiting, at the time. I feel the same way, Albatross. Thank heaven we have one another to help us name and defend ourselves from our secret thoughts and self accusations. Still, I remember when difficult child daughter was teaching and engaged and had the house and everything looked so impossibly bright? And difficult child son was working and happily engaged in raising his own son and things were looking pretty good there? I was like, showing off every chance I got. Which doesn't excuse those biatches for looking down on me just because one of my kids is an addict and the other is...is having the problems she is. (Numb silence descends, and Cedar is alone again, with the horror of what is....) . But here is the thing: It doesn't do any good to pretend that what is happening to us is not happening. I do feel better about everything, though. I just don't quite know how to separate myself, or how to think about all this. I get the genetics piece. [/QUOTE]
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