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Parent Emeritus
Today is the day and apprehension rules...
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<blockquote data-quote="rejectedmom" data-source="post: 338203" data-attributes="member: 2315"><p>I'm relieved that difficult child will be safe and dry but things between me and husband deteriorated after difficult child left for the night without so much as a hug from him. When I asked husband if he thought difficult child was punishing us for not giving in it came out that husband thinks I was too hard on difficult child. </p><p> </p><p>husband feels that way because I told difficult child that he made today a very stressful day instead of a joyful one. I also told difficult child that he had to learn that his actions affect others and that all this was very hard on us. difficult child broke down in tears and that got to husband who now feels that I shouldn't have said those things. I told him that I needed to get it off my chest because I was still angry at difficult child's atempt at manipulation. That way it was behind us and I could get down to the business at hand. I told husband that it seemed like he still felt that I needed to put up and shut up and that those days were over. I also told husband that I was disappointed that he didn't take the initiative or even verbally back me up after he agreed to last night. I told him that as a parent it was OK to advise difficult child when we see him making a poor choice (ie: going to spend two nights with somone he thought had drugged him in the past). husband then said "why when he doesn't take it". I replied "to show a united front. I feel like you left me hanging there by myself." Then husband nastily shouted "I'm sorry I'm not the husband you want me to be. OK?" and that brought up the D word. husband didn't deny when I asked him "If I was at the beach house would you have let difficult child stay here?" husband only said "you'er not at the beach house so you'll never know." UG if it isn't one difficult child it's another! Such a PIA! -RM</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="rejectedmom, post: 338203, member: 2315"] I'm relieved that difficult child will be safe and dry but things between me and husband deteriorated after difficult child left for the night without so much as a hug from him. When I asked husband if he thought difficult child was punishing us for not giving in it came out that husband thinks I was too hard on difficult child. husband feels that way because I told difficult child that he made today a very stressful day instead of a joyful one. I also told difficult child that he had to learn that his actions affect others and that all this was very hard on us. difficult child broke down in tears and that got to husband who now feels that I shouldn't have said those things. I told him that I needed to get it off my chest because I was still angry at difficult child's atempt at manipulation. That way it was behind us and I could get down to the business at hand. I told husband that it seemed like he still felt that I needed to put up and shut up and that those days were over. I also told husband that I was disappointed that he didn't take the initiative or even verbally back me up after he agreed to last night. I told him that as a parent it was OK to advise difficult child when we see him making a poor choice (ie: going to spend two nights with somone he thought had drugged him in the past). husband then said "why when he doesn't take it". I replied "to show a united front. I feel like you left me hanging there by myself." Then husband nastily shouted "I'm sorry I'm not the husband you want me to be. OK?" and that brought up the D word. husband didn't deny when I asked him "If I was at the beach house would you have let difficult child stay here?" husband only said "you'er not at the beach house so you'll never know." UG if it isn't one difficult child it's another! Such a PIA! -RM [/QUOTE]
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