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Trying to Clarify My Feelings....Opinions Welcome!
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<blockquote data-quote="slsh" data-source="post: 359038" data-attributes="member: 8"><p>Oh my goodness.... honestly, I sometimes wonder where some of these therapists' brains are. Would I make the family sacrifice even more just to buy difficult child a horse? Not a chance. Not out of anger or retaliation, but simply because at this point I would bet everyone else has already sacrificed a lot - there's only so much air a difficult child can or should be able to suck out of a family. </p><p></p><p>This would be an excellent opportunity for therapist to bring some "real life" into difficult child's thinking. #1 - don't bite the hand that feeds you. In the real world, if you treat people like dirt, they're not going to bend over backwards to accommodate you. Same rules apply at home. Has nothing to do with- whether or not difficult child hates you, in my humble opinion - it has to do with her behavior. She can hate all she wants, but when she makes everyone else's life miserable, she doesn't get rewarded.</p><p></p><p>#2 - difficult child has made it impossible for you to work outside the home. Therefore, the extras that your income might provide (to say nothing of necessities) aren't there. Cause meet effect. Not only does this impact difficult child, it affects the *entire* family. </p><p></p><p>I think it would be much more realistic to have difficult child get a job to start saving for post HS life - college, apartment, furniture, whatever. Especially since she "hates" you so much - she should be chomping at the bit to get out on her own (pardon the pun). </p><p></p><p>Maybe I'm just way too blue collar, but a horse in my book is a true luxury.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="slsh, post: 359038, member: 8"] Oh my goodness.... honestly, I sometimes wonder where some of these therapists' brains are. Would I make the family sacrifice even more just to buy difficult child a horse? Not a chance. Not out of anger or retaliation, but simply because at this point I would bet everyone else has already sacrificed a lot - there's only so much air a difficult child can or should be able to suck out of a family. This would be an excellent opportunity for therapist to bring some "real life" into difficult child's thinking. #1 - don't bite the hand that feeds you. In the real world, if you treat people like dirt, they're not going to bend over backwards to accommodate you. Same rules apply at home. Has nothing to do with- whether or not difficult child hates you, in my humble opinion - it has to do with her behavior. She can hate all she wants, but when she makes everyone else's life miserable, she doesn't get rewarded. #2 - difficult child has made it impossible for you to work outside the home. Therefore, the extras that your income might provide (to say nothing of necessities) aren't there. Cause meet effect. Not only does this impact difficult child, it affects the *entire* family. I think it would be much more realistic to have difficult child get a job to start saving for post HS life - college, apartment, furniture, whatever. Especially since she "hates" you so much - she should be chomping at the bit to get out on her own (pardon the pun). Maybe I'm just way too blue collar, but a horse in my book is a true luxury. [/QUOTE]
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