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Parent Emeritus
trying to maintain toughlove
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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 262965" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>Hi Stands,</p><p>well, my dtr managed to get a job and she and her boyfriend managed to con people into renting apts. to them, etc. I don't know if I would say she was doing okay but she was on her own and not coming to us for help all the time. She did try to come home last fall when she was pregnant. She lives all the way across the country from us and said she wanted to come home for a visit. I figured out what she was really up to when she said she was buying a one way ticket! I told her "no" and she was angry and didn't speak to me for a while. </p><p></p><p>I guess the main thing is I don't really know how much she has changed because I don't see her or talk to her very often any more. But it doesn't really matter because I am able to have a cordial relationship with her and I know I have to keep my boundaries intact. I know she has lived on the streets and in homeless shelters since leaving home but that is her choice. I think I have come to accept that she is not me and what is unimaginable to me is okay with her. She is a stripper--I certainly wouldn't want to do that for a living but she doesn't mind and she can make a lot of money. So, kudos to her!</p><p></p><p>I live in central New York--we are having sun but it is cold....</p><p></p><p>Hugs,</p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 262965, member: 3450"] Hi Stands, well, my dtr managed to get a job and she and her boyfriend managed to con people into renting apts. to them, etc. I don't know if I would say she was doing okay but she was on her own and not coming to us for help all the time. She did try to come home last fall when she was pregnant. She lives all the way across the country from us and said she wanted to come home for a visit. I figured out what she was really up to when she said she was buying a one way ticket! I told her "no" and she was angry and didn't speak to me for a while. I guess the main thing is I don't really know how much she has changed because I don't see her or talk to her very often any more. But it doesn't really matter because I am able to have a cordial relationship with her and I know I have to keep my boundaries intact. I know she has lived on the streets and in homeless shelters since leaving home but that is her choice. I think I have come to accept that she is not me and what is unimaginable to me is okay with her. She is a stripper--I certainly wouldn't want to do that for a living but she doesn't mind and she can make a lot of money. So, kudos to her! I live in central New York--we are having sun but it is cold.... Hugs, Jane [/QUOTE]
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