Two sides of difficult child

[Wiped Out]

I was trying to decide if I should post the stuff that difficult child is doing right now that is driving me crazy or the cute thing that happened yesterday.

Maybe I'll do both. For the bad, he is so disrespectful and rude right now. Any time that he is told "no" he goes nuts. Trying to distract him or using a word other than no doesn't do any good either. Tonight he was so mad about me asking him to eat in another room before watching tv in my room he started swearing up a storm. Then he came downstairs and made a motion with his finger as though he would slit my throat. He even took a knife out of the drawer and did the action again. husband told him he better knock it off, that he became unsafe again he wouldn't be able to keep living here. He told difficult child the sad thing would be that difficult child could control things better now with his medications so it would be his choices that land him in trouble. difficult child did start to settle down some.

Now for a contrasting look at difficult child. Yesterday one of the little foster boys where difficult child goes for respite called him. difficult child never gets phone calls. He got a huge grin on his face and went to the steps and close the door (like he sees easy child do). The boy wanted to ask difficult child when he was coming again so they could both play DS because the boy just got one and knows difficult child has one.

It's so interesting to look at these two sides of difficult child.

 

[tiredmommy]

I really wish you saw more of the sweet stuff... he can be such a good kid!

 

[Fran]

You need the good things to get through the bad.

 

[graceupongrace]

Those nice moments keep us going, don't they? It's wonderful to see the sweet kid underneath the difficult child-ness.

 

[susiestar]

It is always nice to see the good things our kids can do. Sometimes I think that the reason they do the random seeming kind things is so we don't lose our minds over their other stuff.

It is nice that your husband told him to knock it off. My husband NEVER did that and it used to make me crazy. I esp like that your husband told him it was a choice to be made. Our kids need to have that stressed to them.

 

[Wiped Out]

Thanks everyone! I agree we need the sweet stuff to keep us going through the hard times. He really is such a contrast. He can be his grouchy self one moment and then turn and do something sweet or vice versa.

Susie-I do have to say I was glad husband said what he did. It did make me feel more supported.

 

[LittleDudesMom]

Sharon,

you know that old addage that kids often look like their father' at birth so the father will bond with the child? Mother's do that naturally?

Well, it's kinda like that with our difficult children. They are so challenging most of the time, that it's a blessing to remind us who they are inside when they do something caring, loving or typical-kid-like. Just to bring us back into focus that we love them!

Sharon