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Unconditional love?
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<blockquote data-quote="Lil" data-source="post: 653339" data-attributes="member: 17309"><p>I know ladies...I really do know. I suppose judging his appearance is bad, but let's face it, that's what the whole world does. He's never understood it. I'm certainly within my rights to refuse to be seen in public with him (at our favorite place to eat and people know us) when he looks like a dirtball, but I should have handled it differently. I should have either said, "please shower" or we could have just gone today and said, "Oh, you aren't ready! Go shower. We'll come back in 1/2 hour." </p><p></p><p>But what's done is done. </p><p></p><p>I wish I could find this easier to let go of. I wish I could just detach and not worry. I was closer to that a few months ago, but once again I'm finding it really, really hard. </p><p></p><p>Sure I want "normal"...who doesn't? In the end though, I want him to be happy. I really do. If he were happy being homeless and even dirty and friendless, it would be easier. But he isn't. He hates his life. He always has. I've been doing much better until June started looming so close. He was actually surprised when I reminded him his phone will be shut off. I'm sure he'll be surprised when his landlord tells him to move out. Come May 1 we'll be telling the landlord we won't be responsible for rent anymore and that will be that. Since he isn't working, he'll be told to move out. </p><p></p><p>So the calls will come and the begging. Worry about that has me back to...not stage 1...but not to the point I was just a few months ago.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lil, post: 653339, member: 17309"] I know ladies...I really do know. I suppose judging his appearance is bad, but let's face it, that's what the whole world does. He's never understood it. I'm certainly within my rights to refuse to be seen in public with him (at our favorite place to eat and people know us) when he looks like a dirtball, but I should have handled it differently. I should have either said, "please shower" or we could have just gone today and said, "Oh, you aren't ready! Go shower. We'll come back in 1/2 hour." But what's done is done. I wish I could find this easier to let go of. I wish I could just detach and not worry. I was closer to that a few months ago, but once again I'm finding it really, really hard. Sure I want "normal"...who doesn't? In the end though, I want him to be happy. I really do. If he were happy being homeless and even dirty and friendless, it would be easier. But he isn't. He hates his life. He always has. I've been doing much better until June started looming so close. He was actually surprised when I reminded him his phone will be shut off. I'm sure he'll be surprised when his landlord tells him to move out. Come May 1 we'll be telling the landlord we won't be responsible for rent anymore and that will be that. Since he isn't working, he'll be told to move out. So the calls will come and the begging. Worry about that has me back to...not stage 1...but not to the point I was just a few months ago. [/QUOTE]
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