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Uninvited for Christmas!
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 323465" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Which brings me back to - what is family all about, anyway? Sometimes we get too caught up in the celebration to realise just what harm we do to ourselves and our families, by insisting on everything being perfect. Families generally are not perfect. Celebrations don't always go to plan. As John Lennon said, "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."</p><p></p><p>I have written comedy pieces based on my observations of Christmas celebrations where every little family ritual had to happen, including those little rituals which were in the process of being written. Such as having to lay a place for a recently-deceased family member, then keeping up that tradition every year for the next couple of decades. Such as everyone having to take a photo of the table all laid out, food on plates (rapidly going cold), everyone sitting in their place (squeezed in with extreme difficulty, so every time someone has to get up, it's an exercise in Tetris to re-seat everyone). At mother in law's place (which has more room than our place but is still crowded) you literally have to leave the house by the side door and go round to the front door to re-enter, just to take a plate to the kitchen.</p><p>So when someone says, "I must take a photo!" and they get up to do so, they leave a vacant place. So someone else says, "I'll take a photo of you back in your seat," and this goes round the table. Myriad cameras get produced and photos taken, then people swap places and the whole round begins again. Then someone says, "My food is cold!" and they head for the microwave one after the other (each time, of course, necessitating another Tetris game of human rearrangement). Of course there is always someone who insists everyone be able to all eat at the same time. On this special occasion there is no "Don't wait for me; start without me!" and the whole crowd of people all have to assess their meals to ensure they are all at the right temperature at the same time.</p><p></p><p>Imagine doing this with a room full of difficult children, adult and child.</p><p></p><p>It's no wonder we rarely eat our "midday meal" on these occasions until late afternoon!</p><p></p><p>So if you choose to have a quieter celebration at home, consider yourselves being more in the true spirit of the season. It also teaches your family a powerful lesson in love, in proportion, and depending on other activities you do (such as invite in someone who otherwise would be hoome on their own) in compassion for others.</p><p></p><p>The holidays are often the worst time of the year, for people who live alone.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 323465, member: 1991"] Which brings me back to - what is family all about, anyway? Sometimes we get too caught up in the celebration to realise just what harm we do to ourselves and our families, by insisting on everything being perfect. Families generally are not perfect. Celebrations don't always go to plan. As John Lennon said, "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans." I have written comedy pieces based on my observations of Christmas celebrations where every little family ritual had to happen, including those little rituals which were in the process of being written. Such as having to lay a place for a recently-deceased family member, then keeping up that tradition every year for the next couple of decades. Such as everyone having to take a photo of the table all laid out, food on plates (rapidly going cold), everyone sitting in their place (squeezed in with extreme difficulty, so every time someone has to get up, it's an exercise in Tetris to re-seat everyone). At mother in law's place (which has more room than our place but is still crowded) you literally have to leave the house by the side door and go round to the front door to re-enter, just to take a plate to the kitchen. So when someone says, "I must take a photo!" and they get up to do so, they leave a vacant place. So someone else says, "I'll take a photo of you back in your seat," and this goes round the table. Myriad cameras get produced and photos taken, then people swap places and the whole round begins again. Then someone says, "My food is cold!" and they head for the microwave one after the other (each time, of course, necessitating another Tetris game of human rearrangement). Of course there is always someone who insists everyone be able to all eat at the same time. On this special occasion there is no "Don't wait for me; start without me!" and the whole crowd of people all have to assess their meals to ensure they are all at the right temperature at the same time. Imagine doing this with a room full of difficult children, adult and child. It's no wonder we rarely eat our "midday meal" on these occasions until late afternoon! So if you choose to have a quieter celebration at home, consider yourselves being more in the true spirit of the season. It also teaches your family a powerful lesson in love, in proportion, and depending on other activities you do (such as invite in someone who otherwise would be hoome on their own) in compassion for others. The holidays are often the worst time of the year, for people who live alone. Marg Marg [/QUOTE]
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