Update: Department of Juvenile Justice

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by klmno, Nov 20, 2009.

  1. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    The director delegated the paperwork issue about direct release in lieu of parole and the move stuff to difficult child's CM in Department of Juvenile Justice. She called the PO to coordinate. The parole officer said he can't sendd the stuff to HI until I had an address out there- we already knew that was an option but apparently he failed to mention to her the other option of difficult child being released to me here, then us moving together, then him transferring the paperwork. Anyway, I discussed that weith her and she said that if we do it that way, they don't have paperwork to justify asking the Department of Juvenile Justice committee for an early rellease- so that just puts the issue going around in circles because I told her, I can''t arrange housing and flight tickets until I know when/if difficult child is going.

    Then, as far as direct release or parole- she said she told the PO she would work with him and his decision because it's technically up to him. He apparently talked with his super and the super said it's court ordered for difficult child to go to parole so they can't change that without going before the judge. Well, didn't I say that the other day? And, they (the PO staff) are recommending difficult child stay on parole "in order to monitor him because his last offense was becoming aggressive with me". Well, HELLO, he was on probation and being monitored when he did that so how do you figure that prevents anything? She said it wasn't in her control - it's up to the PO. I said I know, but the PO has told me that he is going to do what the Department of Juvenile Justice people recommend so are they actually recommending direct release? She said something wishy-washy then said "if it gets to that point, she, her super, the PO, and his super, will have a conference call and make a determiniation for recommendation either for parole or direct release". So, I asked if they can do that now so if it's parole, I won't pursue it but if it's direct release, I can get it before the judge and see if she will approve that based on that recommendation? She said no she can't initiate that, I would need to call PO and discuss it with him. Well, he won't initiate anything unless he has a strong recommendation from Department of Juvenile Justice.

    I swear I have never seen so many people avoiding taking a leadership position and just doging responsibility in all my life. This will do nothing but continue to go in circles. She is recommending that I go to HI before difficult child's release then asking PO if he'll pick up difficult child and put him on a plane when difficult child is released so I don't have to come back and get him. I would bet my left arm that there is no way the PO is going to take personal responsibility for that and that the county would never allow it.

    I would call PO as she suggested but based on my previous conversations with him, he just goes aroound in circles too and says he can't even tell me what the parole requirements will be until he finds out what Department of Juvenile Justice recommends.

    I told it is no wonder that some parents throw their arms up in the air and walk off- but it wasn't because they didn't love their kid. I told her I might as well quit trying to make this job in HI work but that I absolutely hated this county CSU and obviously they didn't know how to help my son or he wouldn't have ended up in the state Department of Juvenile Justice to begin with. I told her I didn't know what I was going to do. We discussed a group home option briefly. She sympathized with me then said something like the ball was in my court. I really don';t see how they figure that.
  2. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not


    It sounds as though you are living in the Twilight Zone, too.

    I don't understand people.

  3. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    I guess the CM noticed that she had me at wits end. I just a call from the therapist there, who had pulled difficult child in, and she told me that she was going to send difficult child out of Department of Juvenile Justice with the recommendation that he NOT have court ordered mental health treaatment because 1) he is no longer on medications, 2) he has done very well there and they do not have him listed as MI any longer, and 3) she is confident that if issues start reoccurring or if difficult child asks for a therapist, etc, that I will seerk help for him and advocate for him to get mental health treatment

    She was telling me so that I would know that even though she can't control what the PO and judge might order, she is going to tell them she does not think it is necessary to court order it so maybe this would help me make the decision about whether or not I would be able to handle difficult child coming home and being on parole.
  4. gcvmom

    gcvmom Here we go again!

    Well at least SOMEONE has some sense about all this. Thank goodness for the therapist's level head.
  5. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    Well there are two things I'm sure of- 1) I'm not going to HI with difficult child's future up in the air, and 2) I'm not bringing him home in the same situation he left under.

    I might as well send a letter to the PO stating those things so he can talk to the GAL and she can finally get her way about difficult child not living at home.
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    I am sorry. These people are just so small minded and MEAN. To get your hopes up and then refuse to either make it happen or say NO, well, it is no wonder so many are in Department of Juvenile Justice custody for as long as they are. No one in Department of Juvenile Justice or CSU ever makes a decision and follows it through.

    I am sending big thumps on the head to these people. Hopefully it will activate their restart feature and they will restart, THINK correctly, and get things done.

    I would let the person who told you no parole know that no one taking responsibility may mean no job, no military influence and if difficult child is on parole you will go on welfare because you won't be able to pay for anything because the meetings and appts mean no job is possible.

    It won't change anything but might make you feel better.

    on the other hand, I really think that YOU might benefit from finding a therapist. I know you don't like them. But they CAN be helpful. This situation is causing some real PTSD, and with the earlier abuses you probably have some already. So google EMDR and you should get to the group that oversees EMDR training. From there you can find someone who does EMDR in your area. It is a therapy that I think will work for you. In so many ways.

  7. klmno

    klmno Active Member

    What is so annoying about this to me is that it could be accomplished. But whaen everything gets delegated to people lower on the totem pole, they only deal with things the typical way and don't want to pursue any other avenue. It might just be a vent that never gets sent to anyone, but I've already written a letter to PO, copying everyone else involved, and basicly saying in so many words- "here's the situation, here's what I'm being told, I'm not bringing the child home to the same situation we were in before this happened, I'm not moving to HI with all this unresolved, if I don't take this job I'm not in a position to do everything required of me, you all please figure it out and let me know what you decide is in his best interest so I can plan accordingly".

    Susie, it isn't that I'm against tdocs or therapy. Really. I just happen to think that many are not providing good, adequate therapy and many way over-sell themselves. I have no insurance right now, cannot afford to pay for it out-of-pocket, and it can effect my clearance right now and the way things are handled with difficult child. Therefore, right now it is out of the question. I don't feel it is any major loss because the tdocs around here are **** compared to ones I've dealt with in the past so frankly, I have found them a waste of time who in some cases, do more harm than good. It's kind of like medications- they aren't always "take this- it cures it all". If you get a good one- it's great- but they aren't all good and I can't do it right now anyway. I am pulling on tecniques I learned from therapy in the past but that doesn't make the situation go away- ok I know I can't change the situation- I just want it resolved. OK??

    Look how many people on here who are on medications and see a therapist are still frustrated and venting- does it always solve the problem? No. I'm not syaing that to be nasty- it's just an observation.

    The bottom line issue that threw a glitch in this is that Department of Juvenile Justice is saying they can't go to the committee and ask for an early release without some "plan" from PO indicating that I am moving. PO is saying that he can't submit interstate paperwork until I have already moved. OK- I understand that. But, he can PLAN for a freaking move so that once I get the confirmation (assuming I do), Department of Juvenile Justice can go to the committee. But, it's not typical for PO to get paperwork ready until after the person has already moved so I guess this messes up his normal way of doing things. Arghhh.....

    That's the main thing- but as far aas parole- it is beyond me why the director brought that up and acted like she could and would do something about it, only to just delegate it to someone who leaves it in the PO's hands. I think it goes bacak to GAL having our CSU people in the county convinced that if difficult child lives with me, he (we) need to remain under their supervision. But, the Department of Juvenile Justice people see that this is a big part of the problem- they just apparently don't say that to the county people for some reason I don't understand so the judge only hears this one side and not the other, from anyone but me.

    No offense ,but I don't see why I need a therapist because I find this frustrating and infuriating.
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2009