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Update: Detachment as Spiritual Practice, and an Update
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 614213" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p><strong><span style="color: #0000cd"><em>"It was never that I didn't know things were forever out of whack in my family of origin, it was that I didn't know another way to fix it than to fix what it looked like. That is what I carried into my adult life. Now, just lately, I am coming to understand that it cannot be fixed. It is what it is. I cannot surmount or stitch it up into something it isn't. The false notes get louder and more discordant, the healthier I become."</em></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #0000cd"><em></em></span></strong></p><p><strong><span style="color: #0000cd"><em></em></span></strong>Cedar the above quote is very wise and very true. I believe that to the degree that we are aware of that truth, we can then shift our beliefs and as a result our experience of life and how we perceive it into something entirely different. We did the best we could with what was in front of us and at some point, we were supposed to let go, but the "trying to make it into something it isn't" part had become who we were. That's okay, we did the best we could...............but now? Now we know better, there is <strong>way </strong>more than our limited perception of that truth we inherited and then created to survive. </p><p></p><p>Like me, as we extricate ourselves from the "roles" we took on and allow our true selves to emerge.......... beliefs, expectations, judgments, fears and people begin to fall into our rear view............a casualty of our growth. It is the way it is for a <em>seeker of truth.</em></p><p><em></em></p><p><em></em>I think it's imperative to get nurtured during this "perfect storm" you've invited in............of course you would feel wrong, cut off and confused, it is a monumental change you are going through and it feels scary and does indeed cause anxiety......... and the thought "What have I done?" NOT stepping in to fix it is just as powerful a shift as if you were addicted to heroin, it is, in my way of thinking, a withdrawal from a long, long addiction. That's how we lowered the anxiety as a child, now it <em>causes</em> anxiety. Walking away from something that kept us on familiar ground produces a lot of anxiety, especially when those around you are flipping out and making you wrong. That place of change, that internal conflict to go with the truth or stay mired in old thinking is what causes the <em>fog..</em>.............will I succumb to conditioned thinking or pop out into a new reality and risk the unknown? Hang on <em>bad</em> Cedar...............</p><p></p><p>I like what you said about feeling stronger, saner and more centered, I feel that way too. I think that is the remarkable reward for being true to oneself, a certain comfort within that can't be there when we are busy being something other then who we really are. I love that feeling. Enjoy this Cedar.................. all of those moments of 'bad' Cedar emerging will weave together into authentic, whole, beautiful, joyful, connected, clear, strong and courageous Cedar. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/happy-very.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":happy-very:" title="happy-very :happy-very:" data-shortname=":happy-very:" /></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p><p><span style="color: #000000"></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 614213, member: 13542"] [B][COLOR=#0000cd][I]"It was never that I didn't know things were forever out of whack in my family of origin, it was that I didn't know another way to fix it than to fix what it looked like. That is what I carried into my adult life. Now, just lately, I am coming to understand that it cannot be fixed. It is what it is. I cannot surmount or stitch it up into something it isn't. The false notes get louder and more discordant, the healthier I become." [/I][/COLOR][/B]Cedar the above quote is very wise and very true. I believe that to the degree that we are aware of that truth, we can then shift our beliefs and as a result our experience of life and how we perceive it into something entirely different. We did the best we could with what was in front of us and at some point, we were supposed to let go, but the "trying to make it into something it isn't" part had become who we were. That's okay, we did the best we could...............but now? Now we know better, there is [B]way [/B]more than our limited perception of that truth we inherited and then created to survive. Like me, as we extricate ourselves from the "roles" we took on and allow our true selves to emerge.......... beliefs, expectations, judgments, fears and people begin to fall into our rear view............a casualty of our growth. It is the way it is for a [I]seeker of truth. [/I]I think it's imperative to get nurtured during this "perfect storm" you've invited in............of course you would feel wrong, cut off and confused, it is a monumental change you are going through and it feels scary and does indeed cause anxiety......... and the thought "What have I done?" NOT stepping in to fix it is just as powerful a shift as if you were addicted to heroin, it is, in my way of thinking, a withdrawal from a long, long addiction. That's how we lowered the anxiety as a child, now it [I]causes[/I] anxiety. Walking away from something that kept us on familiar ground produces a lot of anxiety, especially when those around you are flipping out and making you wrong. That place of change, that internal conflict to go with the truth or stay mired in old thinking is what causes the [I]fog..[/I].............will I succumb to conditioned thinking or pop out into a new reality and risk the unknown? Hang on [I]bad[/I] Cedar............... I like what you said about feeling stronger, saner and more centered, I feel that way too. I think that is the remarkable reward for being true to oneself, a certain comfort within that can't be there when we are busy being something other then who we really are. I love that feeling. Enjoy this Cedar.................. all of those moments of 'bad' Cedar emerging will weave together into authentic, whole, beautiful, joyful, connected, clear, strong and courageous Cedar. :happy-very: [COLOR=#000000] [/COLOR] [/QUOTE]
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