Update: difficult child's First Day at Camp

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by DaisyFace, Aug 8, 2010.

  1. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    Well, the doctor was good enough to drop me a line and let me know how difficult child was getting along today.

    And BIG surprise, everything is just hunky-dory. difficult child is all sunshine and roses and making friends and speaking positively yadda, yadda, yadda.... doctor is sure that we'll be able to make some real, positive strides on our family relationships because difficult child has spoken so positively about her family.


    Give me a freakin' break!

    If the doctor falls for this garbage I'm just gonna scream.
  2. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It

    The camp is still in early days for difficult child. Let difficult child stay up late and have lots of candy and junk food, then go to camp. I bet after a few days of that her tune will change. Also insist she do some chores at home - if she can do chores at camp she can do them at home too. This will help the doctor get to see the REAL difficult child. Many of us ease off of the expectations if our child is at something like this camp where they are working a good part of the day. It is good if the child needs to perform and we want them to be on good behavior.

    Your case is different. You want her to show her gfgness. So keep the home expectations in place (more realistic because adults still have to come home and do chores after work) and let her have some "rewards" like staying up later because she is being "responsible" at camp. It is a way to encourage her to let down her guard and show her true colors, even if it may feel a bit manipulative. Even if it is manipulative, the goal is not to make her fail but to let the doctor see what she is truly like so that he can really help her. He cannot treat what he cannot see, after all.

    Is there any way you could have some video cameras installed while she is out so that you could record her actions for the doctor to see? Unless these docs can really see what the difficult children are doing they have a hard time not being taken in by their angel acts. Also, if difficult child has inappropriate clothing that you fight about, why not let her wear the clothing to psychiatrist appts and/or to this camp? It may help the doctor see the real difficult child.
  3. tiredmommy

    tiredmommy Site Moderator

    Honeymoon. ;)
  4. Wiped Out

    Wiped Out Well-Known Member Staff Member

    It's definitely early-give her time.
  5. DaisyFace

    DaisyFace Love me...Love me not

    O I just knew you all would understand!

    Thank you!

    You know, I was having such a nice day yesterday, and then I got the message from the doctor and I just fumed. It's not fair that others get to see this "wonderful, helpful young lady" and we have to live with a despicable little troll.

    I am hoping that difficult child will show her true colors today. Yesterday was mostly a "meet and greet" type of environment....complete with staying up late and eating pizza and playing video games. Today, campers are supposed to start "getting down to business" and working on their issues. I hope somebody in that group just sets her off no end. That would be GREAT!

    Then doctor could write to me about what an angel my child is... NOT!
  6. timer lady

    timer lady Queen of Hearts

    DF, I never saw the happy go lucky tweedles in action. Like you, we always have the dramas, the rages, meltdowns, & other difficult child antics. However, I agree ~ this is honeymoon time. difficult child may "out".

    If she doesn't you may have some clues as to the attachment disorder - that it's far worse than you know or the psychiatrists have acknowledged.