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Substance Abuse
update-maintaining the status quo-chatty post ahead
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<blockquote data-quote="AmericanGirl" data-source="post: 538367"><p>Sig,</p><p></p><p>Thanks for the update. Even when I don't get here for a while, I still think of all of you and wonder how things are going.</p><p></p><p>Sounds to me like there has been progress in several ways for you. I'm happy to here that he has been around and things aren't falling apart. You are setting boundaries and following through (ain't it awful sometimes?!?)</p><p></p><p>I LOVE your phrase...you aren't going to chase him. I shall be using that myself.</p><p></p><p>As for peers passing him by....that really bugs my son. He should be finishing his freshman year in college. Instead, he is facing months in a sober house and working fast food. Sure, I'm disappointed but he has to find his own path. And if the facts that his peers are doing things he wishes he were doing, he can choose to turn those emotions into positive actions for his life.</p><p></p><p>I'm hoping that will be the same for your son.</p><p></p><p>You speak about intuition. Mine was so very wrong so often that I have all but abandoned many of my old thinking patterns. I've learned I cannot assume addicts think like I do because they don't. The latest example is my son's new roommate at the sober house sent me a friend invite on Facebook. I have never met him. My thinking said..."isn't that sweet?" My therapist (who has a lot of time in substance abuse therapy/classes) said, "Wonder what he is up to?"</p><p></p><p>See what I mean?</p><p></p><p>Guess my ability to trust my feelings is another casualty of having alcoholics around.... Hang in there. Update when you can.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="AmericanGirl, post: 538367"] Sig, Thanks for the update. Even when I don't get here for a while, I still think of all of you and wonder how things are going. Sounds to me like there has been progress in several ways for you. I'm happy to here that he has been around and things aren't falling apart. You are setting boundaries and following through (ain't it awful sometimes?!?) I LOVE your phrase...you aren't going to chase him. I shall be using that myself. As for peers passing him by....that really bugs my son. He should be finishing his freshman year in college. Instead, he is facing months in a sober house and working fast food. Sure, I'm disappointed but he has to find his own path. And if the facts that his peers are doing things he wishes he were doing, he can choose to turn those emotions into positive actions for his life. I'm hoping that will be the same for your son. You speak about intuition. Mine was so very wrong so often that I have all but abandoned many of my old thinking patterns. I've learned I cannot assume addicts think like I do because they don't. The latest example is my son's new roommate at the sober house sent me a friend invite on Facebook. I have never met him. My thinking said..."isn't that sweet?" My therapist (who has a lot of time in substance abuse therapy/classes) said, "Wonder what he is up to?" See what I mean? Guess my ability to trust my feelings is another casualty of having alcoholics around.... Hang in there. Update when you can. [/QUOTE]
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