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Update of a bone-weary step-parent
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<blockquote data-quote="feelingfrustrated" data-source="post: 649487" data-attributes="member: 18778"><p>Well, she wasn't at the house when I returned home from work, so that was a relief. I know my husband had a difficult day with all the drama. From what he told me, she was first upset when he told her that the locks had been changed on the house and she could no longer enter it when we were not home. After that, he said she did calm down some, but when she went upstairs to discover that her clothes, belongings had been packed away, she started throwing a fit. She emptied some of the boxes of clothes I had packed up for her onto the floor, she broke a few of her own belongings, she spread garbage on the floor. That's just what I could see from a quick look. My husband said she threatened to cut her wrists or to move to the Cities to sell heroin so she could make some money, among other things. She screamed at him how she hates me and never wants to see me again (I guess I'm the bad guy that she can blame, but I really don't care anymore). She also reportedly said she hated her sister, her mother, her father. You know, everyone who has ever been there to support her. She also reportedly called her mother several times to complain about what was going on. What she thought her mother could do is beyond me, although her mother has, as I've mentioned before, tried to intervene in what happens in our own home. </p><p></p><p>It was a surprise, however, to learn that the ex called my husband prior to the difficult one showing up to ask him to try to get in touch with the difficult one as she (the ex) had received a call/text from difficult one indicating she was walking down the road and was freezing (below freezing temps in our neck of the woods). My husband said he tried several times to contact difficult one without success, so it was a complete surprise when she entered the house shortly afterward, wanting to shower and get ready to go to town to "put in job applications". </p><p></p><p>In discussing the events with my husband, I told him that his daughter has a very strong will to survive and that her threats to commit suicide are just that, threats. Hopefully I am correct. Whether or not she will return to dealing drugs - who knows? Maybe. But that will be her choice. And maybe, just maybe, if she does that and gets caught, she might come to realize the error of her ways and grow up a bit. </p><p></p><p>Terry, when I indicated I was afraid, it is not that I am physically afraid of the difficult one, or that she will steal more of my personal belongings, I am more afraid about what havoc she will create in my marriage to her father and that she will end up destroying the loving relationship I have with him. I am also afraid that if he continues to support/enable her, it will end up destroying him. There are so many intangibles at play in these types of situations and it is hard to feel that much of the outcome is out of your control. </p><p></p><p>But I am feeling a bit of relief that the initial phase of letting her know her actions are unacceptable have begun. Now to sit back and watch how it will all play out. I am somewhat concerned with how the different cast members of this macabre play will act in the coming days and what type of manipulations they will attempt....</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="feelingfrustrated, post: 649487, member: 18778"] Well, she wasn't at the house when I returned home from work, so that was a relief. I know my husband had a difficult day with all the drama. From what he told me, she was first upset when he told her that the locks had been changed on the house and she could no longer enter it when we were not home. After that, he said she did calm down some, but when she went upstairs to discover that her clothes, belongings had been packed away, she started throwing a fit. She emptied some of the boxes of clothes I had packed up for her onto the floor, she broke a few of her own belongings, she spread garbage on the floor. That's just what I could see from a quick look. My husband said she threatened to cut her wrists or to move to the Cities to sell heroin so she could make some money, among other things. She screamed at him how she hates me and never wants to see me again (I guess I'm the bad guy that she can blame, but I really don't care anymore). She also reportedly said she hated her sister, her mother, her father. You know, everyone who has ever been there to support her. She also reportedly called her mother several times to complain about what was going on. What she thought her mother could do is beyond me, although her mother has, as I've mentioned before, tried to intervene in what happens in our own home. It was a surprise, however, to learn that the ex called my husband prior to the difficult one showing up to ask him to try to get in touch with the difficult one as she (the ex) had received a call/text from difficult one indicating she was walking down the road and was freezing (below freezing temps in our neck of the woods). My husband said he tried several times to contact difficult one without success, so it was a complete surprise when she entered the house shortly afterward, wanting to shower and get ready to go to town to "put in job applications". In discussing the events with my husband, I told him that his daughter has a very strong will to survive and that her threats to commit suicide are just that, threats. Hopefully I am correct. Whether or not she will return to dealing drugs - who knows? Maybe. But that will be her choice. And maybe, just maybe, if she does that and gets caught, she might come to realize the error of her ways and grow up a bit. Terry, when I indicated I was afraid, it is not that I am physically afraid of the difficult one, or that she will steal more of my personal belongings, I am more afraid about what havoc she will create in my marriage to her father and that she will end up destroying the loving relationship I have with him. I am also afraid that if he continues to support/enable her, it will end up destroying him. There are so many intangibles at play in these types of situations and it is hard to feel that much of the outcome is out of your control. But I am feeling a bit of relief that the initial phase of letting her know her actions are unacceptable have begun. Now to sit back and watch how it will all play out. I am somewhat concerned with how the different cast members of this macabre play will act in the coming days and what type of manipulations they will attempt.... [/QUOTE]
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Update of a bone-weary step-parent
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