Hi Everyone,
I've been meaning to update for ages. I think it has been months...
Anyway, difficult child 1 has as usual had drama in the past few months. She left the boyfriend in June or July and he came to the campground where she was staying with friends and he tried to push her into a campfire and was threatening to kill her and take her baby. The baby, Liam (was about 8 months old at the time) was crying so he hit him on the head and said, "I'll give you something to cry about." difficult child 1, E, ran with the baby to the camp ranger, the police were called, and they came and arrested the boyfriend.
The boyfriend was in jail and E was proud of herself for putting him there (I found out later that he has been extremely abusive to her, more than I knew). Okay, great. But then E must have panicked without him because she just disappeared for 10 days. She left Liam with her friends and just didn't come back or contact anyone. Her friend contacted me and she was willing to keep Liam, just was nervous about it since she had no legal right to him. I was kind of shocked that E just left but I figured she was "okay."
She did surface again and turns out she had been doing heroin (a drug she did before meeting her boyfriend) and just living on the streets. She decided she didn't want to do it anymore and checked herself into an outpatient drug rehab. Meanwhile, boyfriend was released from jail because she missed the court date to testify against him. He reported E's friends to CPS and CPS gave the baby back to E who had no place to stay. I told her to find a shelter and she was referred to one by the YMCA that takes young domestic violence victims.
So, as of now, she is apparently living in a studio apt. provided by the shelter and she is working at a different strip club and her friends are helping her with the baby.
As always, I know the story I am told is probably somewhat true but may have "gaps". Anyway, she sounds good when I talk to her on the phone and I hope she really is on a better path now. She said she felt she could not live, could not even breathe, without boyfriend and that is why she turned back to drugs. She seems to be doing okay without him now--of course she could be with him again for all I know but I can only go by what she tells me and let it go. I try very hard to just be there to encourage her but not give her too much advice and to know that a life full of drama may be what I'm dealing with til I'm dead and I just have to be happy for the "lull" times.
Okay, on to easy child/difficult child 2. She graduated from high school in June and is now off on a gap year program. As of this minute she is flying to New Delhi, India. We saw her off from our town in upstate NY on Monday morning and she flew to San Francisco to meet up with her group leaders and groupmates and they left San Francisco at 1:20am (SF time) for India. She will be there for 3 months doing service work, learning Hindi, etc. Then in December she comes home for a month or so and then goes on a solo internship. She has chosen to go to Argentina to work on a horse ranch out in the middle of nowhere.
I'm really proud of her courage to do this. She lacks a lot of self confidence in her abilities so I am hoping she will find out she is far more capable than she knows. She has always wanted to see the world and has always had a great interest in other cultures. She went out of her way to befriend kids from other countries who were in her classes (we have lots of foreign grad students here with families).
Thanks for always being "there", sorry I haven't been posting much but I do read every day!
Oh, so now we are temporarily empty nesters!
Jane
I've been meaning to update for ages. I think it has been months...
Anyway, difficult child 1 has as usual had drama in the past few months. She left the boyfriend in June or July and he came to the campground where she was staying with friends and he tried to push her into a campfire and was threatening to kill her and take her baby. The baby, Liam (was about 8 months old at the time) was crying so he hit him on the head and said, "I'll give you something to cry about." difficult child 1, E, ran with the baby to the camp ranger, the police were called, and they came and arrested the boyfriend.
The boyfriend was in jail and E was proud of herself for putting him there (I found out later that he has been extremely abusive to her, more than I knew). Okay, great. But then E must have panicked without him because she just disappeared for 10 days. She left Liam with her friends and just didn't come back or contact anyone. Her friend contacted me and she was willing to keep Liam, just was nervous about it since she had no legal right to him. I was kind of shocked that E just left but I figured she was "okay."
She did surface again and turns out she had been doing heroin (a drug she did before meeting her boyfriend) and just living on the streets. She decided she didn't want to do it anymore and checked herself into an outpatient drug rehab. Meanwhile, boyfriend was released from jail because she missed the court date to testify against him. He reported E's friends to CPS and CPS gave the baby back to E who had no place to stay. I told her to find a shelter and she was referred to one by the YMCA that takes young domestic violence victims.
So, as of now, she is apparently living in a studio apt. provided by the shelter and she is working at a different strip club and her friends are helping her with the baby.
As always, I know the story I am told is probably somewhat true but may have "gaps". Anyway, she sounds good when I talk to her on the phone and I hope she really is on a better path now. She said she felt she could not live, could not even breathe, without boyfriend and that is why she turned back to drugs. She seems to be doing okay without him now--of course she could be with him again for all I know but I can only go by what she tells me and let it go. I try very hard to just be there to encourage her but not give her too much advice and to know that a life full of drama may be what I'm dealing with til I'm dead and I just have to be happy for the "lull" times.
Okay, on to easy child/difficult child 2. She graduated from high school in June and is now off on a gap year program. As of this minute she is flying to New Delhi, India. We saw her off from our town in upstate NY on Monday morning and she flew to San Francisco to meet up with her group leaders and groupmates and they left San Francisco at 1:20am (SF time) for India. She will be there for 3 months doing service work, learning Hindi, etc. Then in December she comes home for a month or so and then goes on a solo internship. She has chosen to go to Argentina to work on a horse ranch out in the middle of nowhere.
I'm really proud of her courage to do this. She lacks a lot of self confidence in her abilities so I am hoping she will find out she is far more capable than she knows. She has always wanted to see the world and has always had a great interest in other cultures. She went out of her way to befriend kids from other countries who were in her classes (we have lots of foreign grad students here with families).
Thanks for always being "there", sorry I haven't been posting much but I do read every day!
Oh, so now we are temporarily empty nesters!
Jane
and Liam
. And now our little Globetrotter. 
