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Update on Cutting....
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<blockquote data-quote="aninom" data-source="post: 324189" data-attributes="member: 8513"><p>Daisy - what a nightmare. I really don't know what I would believe in this situation (is she saying it was sexual assault only to the doctor because it WAS assault and she feels ashamed and doesn't want to raise a fuss? Or because it WASN'T and she wants the doctor on her pity side, but not the lie to get out of hand and her boyfriend into trouble?) </p><p> </p><p>I'd also say, you know your own daughter the best. Being somewhat young myself it does sound like she is attracted to the goth/emo side of things, vampires being a very big fad right now. </p><p> </p><p>Another poster was right, unfortunately, there is always the risk someone older has recognized her as a girl that is in an unsure, troubled place right now, and is using that. On the other hand if this did happen on school grounds I doubt the age difference is that significant - and I wonder that, had she been and felt harassed, she wouldn't have complained about the guy to her friends. </p><p> </p><p>She doesn't sound like the type to immobilized by shame over inappropriate touching that she wouldn't either protest, tell a friend or two, or casually mention it in general conversation with them. This is how I remember issues of groping and stalking being handled by us in school, on a spectrum, no matter if the guilty guy was an outcast or someone the gropee even felt attracted to: something like it happened, it still felt uncomfortable and you had to share, but making a big fuss about it was a big no-no. I guess I am still torn about what your daughter's behavior means: maybe it did make her feel uncomfortable, but wasn't something she'd want to let anyone in school know how she felt about? What a mess.</p><p> </p><p>I hope it turns out alright, I hope harassment isn't the issue. I agree with Star: If the allegations turn out to be false, it will be that one big public thing you can use to get the proper channels to take this seriously. Our difficult child was never as extreme at school (when she did show up) as at home: it took a major incident for them to get the full picture.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="aninom, post: 324189, member: 8513"] Daisy - what a nightmare. I really don't know what I would believe in this situation (is she saying it was sexual assault only to the doctor because it WAS assault and she feels ashamed and doesn't want to raise a fuss? Or because it WASN'T and she wants the doctor on her pity side, but not the lie to get out of hand and her boyfriend into trouble?) I'd also say, you know your own daughter the best. Being somewhat young myself it does sound like she is attracted to the goth/emo side of things, vampires being a very big fad right now. Another poster was right, unfortunately, there is always the risk someone older has recognized her as a girl that is in an unsure, troubled place right now, and is using that. On the other hand if this did happen on school grounds I doubt the age difference is that significant - and I wonder that, had she been and felt harassed, she wouldn't have complained about the guy to her friends. She doesn't sound like the type to immobilized by shame over inappropriate touching that she wouldn't either protest, tell a friend or two, or casually mention it in general conversation with them. This is how I remember issues of groping and stalking being handled by us in school, on a spectrum, no matter if the guilty guy was an outcast or someone the gropee even felt attracted to: something like it happened, it still felt uncomfortable and you had to share, but making a big fuss about it was a big no-no. I guess I am still torn about what your daughter's behavior means: maybe it did make her feel uncomfortable, but wasn't something she'd want to let anyone in school know how she felt about? What a mess. I hope it turns out alright, I hope harassment isn't the issue. I agree with Star: If the allegations turn out to be false, it will be that one big public thing you can use to get the proper channels to take this seriously. Our difficult child was never as extreme at school (when she did show up) as at home: it took a major incident for them to get the full picture. [/QUOTE]
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