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Substance Abuse
Update on daughter
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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 459601" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>Thank you for your replies . Yes, we just got out of the court system. We had to criminalize her behavior to get before a judge. They sent her for a 45 day evaluation where they told us she was borderline personality disorder, along with the PTSD. They recommended therapuetic foster care to see if she could manage in another environment a distance away from old contacts. They also said that emancipation might work. We did not agree as she is so dependent on others. However, theses were the professionals. So DCFS placed her in a foster home near us and not away from contacts. We also found out it was not therapeutic and this single mother worked 12 hour days and my daughter and her other foster child (who was pregnant and got pregnant on her watch) were left to their own devises. Of course, my daughter contacted old disfunctional "friends" and ran off 3 times before we got back before the judge. This foster home was a nightmare as well. The women swore at difficult child, belittled, had no understanding of mental illness, drank every night,didn't take her to the doctor (we ended up coming late at night and she had strep, a sinus infection and later pneumonia). Judge was angry at DCFS and foster agency and told them they were yet again incompetent and placed her in JJS custody and Residential Treatment Center (RTC), which is what we had asked for to begin with. She did well for several months learning DBT, which is the recommended therapy for borderline. Just before she was to come home for good, she had a melt-down and took 60 pills at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC)-we almost lost her. We filed a complaint with the state and so did the JJS worker and supervisor. They got in trouble had to do some "training" and file some reports and changes. However, none of that was available when we saw the judge. He just dropped her from the system. He asked us, "What do you want a magic bullet? She'll be back in my courtroom." So here we sit waiting for the magic bullet I guess! We are asking our church for help and thinking that the GED is not a bad idea. She could then go to get her licence to do hair (something that has been a consistant goal for her). She just has to stay home and I don't think she will. There is no stopping a kid who is almost 17 that decides they are not coming home. It would get physical to get her in car or to try and block her from running. She knows this is not good, but can't seem to control herself. She told us again that she is a monster, that she can't get over the abuse, and that she hates herself. She even said, "I can't see myself living past 25." Is this manipulation, who knows. But her safety is on our minds and we have no control over that. If we do see this judge again-he will throw her into secure care (jail) for truency and running until 21. That was his threat. She'll just get worse there with no therapy. What a broken system we have. How did we get to this point? What else could we do? We have done it all-therapy, private Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and public Residential Treatment Center (RTC) etc. We love her, but what next?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 459601, member: 11001"] Thank you for your replies . Yes, we just got out of the court system. We had to criminalize her behavior to get before a judge. They sent her for a 45 day evaluation where they told us she was borderline personality disorder, along with the PTSD. They recommended therapuetic foster care to see if she could manage in another environment a distance away from old contacts. They also said that emancipation might work. We did not agree as she is so dependent on others. However, theses were the professionals. So DCFS placed her in a foster home near us and not away from contacts. We also found out it was not therapeutic and this single mother worked 12 hour days and my daughter and her other foster child (who was pregnant and got pregnant on her watch) were left to their own devises. Of course, my daughter contacted old disfunctional "friends" and ran off 3 times before we got back before the judge. This foster home was a nightmare as well. The women swore at difficult child, belittled, had no understanding of mental illness, drank every night,didn't take her to the doctor (we ended up coming late at night and she had strep, a sinus infection and later pneumonia). Judge was angry at DCFS and foster agency and told them they were yet again incompetent and placed her in JJS custody and Residential Treatment Center (RTC), which is what we had asked for to begin with. She did well for several months learning DBT, which is the recommended therapy for borderline. Just before she was to come home for good, she had a melt-down and took 60 pills at the Residential Treatment Center (RTC)-we almost lost her. We filed a complaint with the state and so did the JJS worker and supervisor. They got in trouble had to do some "training" and file some reports and changes. However, none of that was available when we saw the judge. He just dropped her from the system. He asked us, "What do you want a magic bullet? She'll be back in my courtroom." So here we sit waiting for the magic bullet I guess! We are asking our church for help and thinking that the GED is not a bad idea. She could then go to get her licence to do hair (something that has been a consistant goal for her). She just has to stay home and I don't think she will. There is no stopping a kid who is almost 17 that decides they are not coming home. It would get physical to get her in car or to try and block her from running. She knows this is not good, but can't seem to control herself. She told us again that she is a monster, that she can't get over the abuse, and that she hates herself. She even said, "I can't see myself living past 25." Is this manipulation, who knows. But her safety is on our minds and we have no control over that. If we do see this judge again-he will throw her into secure care (jail) for truency and running until 21. That was his threat. She'll just get worse there with no therapy. What a broken system we have. How did we get to this point? What else could we do? We have done it all-therapy, private Residential Treatment Center (RTC) and public Residential Treatment Center (RTC) etc. We love her, but what next? [/QUOTE]
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