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Update on difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="Nomad" data-source="post: 298769"><p>Sometimes what I have done with- my difficult child is this "meet me halfway" deal. </p><p>For example, you might gather the information your son would need to get a new Social Security card, give it to him, but then expect him to actually do the work to get one. If not, don't worry about it...keep it in case it comes up again.</p><p> </p><p>I certainly do think it is possible that at a certain point in time, the girlfriend will get tired of your difficult child not working. This might take awhile, but the day will likely come.</p><p> </p><p>Hopefully, when that day arrives, she will motivate him to get to work.</p><p> </p><p>by the way, that might be a good time to mention again his need for a Soc. Sec. card and you might mention it to him in front of his girlfriend! heee heee</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes a girlfriend can be a positive motivator. Honestly, come to think of it, surely she can be a bigger motivator than you. Hmmmm...she is working. She likes your difficult child. It would probably be best to stay on her good side...at least neutral. </p><p> </p><p>I don't know what in the world I would do about the fine. Is there any work you need around the house that he has the skills to do and is willing to do? Perhaps you could hire him for this work and then instead of paying him, pay off the fine. I wouldn't even consider it though if he doesn't want to do it, doesn't have the skills to do the work, there isn't any work you can think of to be done, or he is disrespectful.</p><p> </p><p>I believe Suz keeps this site at the bottom of her posts: <a href="http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/" target="_blank"><span style="color: #24618e">http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/</span></a></p><p> </p><p>It's got great information about detaching!!!! (Hugs).</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Wishing you and your family well.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nomad, post: 298769"] Sometimes what I have done with- my difficult child is this "meet me halfway" deal. For example, you might gather the information your son would need to get a new Social Security card, give it to him, but then expect him to actually do the work to get one. If not, don't worry about it...keep it in case it comes up again. I certainly do think it is possible that at a certain point in time, the girlfriend will get tired of your difficult child not working. This might take awhile, but the day will likely come. Hopefully, when that day arrives, she will motivate him to get to work. by the way, that might be a good time to mention again his need for a Soc. Sec. card and you might mention it to him in front of his girlfriend! heee heee Sometimes a girlfriend can be a positive motivator. Honestly, come to think of it, surely she can be a bigger motivator than you. Hmmmm...she is working. She likes your difficult child. It would probably be best to stay on her good side...at least neutral. I don't know what in the world I would do about the fine. Is there any work you need around the house that he has the skills to do and is willing to do? Perhaps you could hire him for this work and then instead of paying him, pay off the fine. I wouldn't even consider it though if he doesn't want to do it, doesn't have the skills to do the work, there isn't any work you can think of to be done, or he is disrespectful. I believe Suz keeps this site at the bottom of her posts: [URL="http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/"][COLOR=#24618e]http://www.livestrong.com/article/14712-developing-detachment/[/COLOR][/URL] It's got great information about detaching!!!! (Hugs). Wishing you and your family well. [/QUOTE]
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