Update on difficult child

Discussion in 'Parent Emeritus' started by everywoman, Jun 5, 2007.

  1. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    Well, still no job. He hasn't started community service hours. But those are issued for his probabtion officer to deal with, not his mom. I told him that I would not be his warden. If he wants to sleep until 2 every afternoon---knock himself out.

    He has been to his first visit with voc-rehab. They have accepted him as a client. He has an assessment this week on Friday. It will tell them where to start.

    He did complete the requirements for graduation.

    He has been home every night and has not (at least that I know of) been hanging with his old crowd.

    He is doing NA meetings every night and has a sponsor who he says he talks to daily. So, there are some postives.

    I just wish he would get his lazy behind to work!
  2. Fran

    Fran Former Site Owner

    I know the feeling of wanting difficult child up and being productive. I always feel like difficult child does better when he has the structure of work or school.
    I'll be curious about the voc rehab. Hopefully it will give him some direction.
    I know you are relieved that he met the requirements for high school graduation and isn't going out with his friends.
  3. witzend

    witzend Well-Known Member

    One day at a time, Kat. I am glad to hear that you are letting the issues lay with him (on the sofa) instead of taking them upon yourself. They are, after all, his issues.
  4. KFld

    KFld New Member

    The fact that he's going to meetings every night and has a sponsor is a huge plus. Hopefully the job will come along soon and everything will be looking up.
  5. Sunlight

    Sunlight Active Member

    I think he is doing well, I wonder though if he is sleeping out of boredom and depression.

    I might think about having him do yardwork.
  6. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Katmom, You are correct there are many positives and one of them is your detaching from his responsibilities and letting his PO handle it. I truly admire you. I am not sure I could do that with my difficult child under my roof. I am glad that yor difficult child is getting things done. I am sure there is some mild depression going on. It is hard for us to admit sometimes given what they put us through and the fact that they do these things to themselves, but they are traumatized by all that happens also. I hope he is just sorting things out in his head and that sleep is merely an escape until he has other things to distract him I am sure he is having some thoughts that he cannot deal with constantly. I am rooting for him and hope that things get much better for your family very soon. -RM-RM
  7. everywoman

    everywoman Active Member

    "I might think about having him do yardwork."

    Janet, he is the laziest person I know. I have tried getting him to do work. He will only work if he needs money. Right now he is not using, so he needs very little. I spent yesterday with a bad knee pressure washing my deck and getting the pool ready. Do you think he work up to help? Not a chance.
  8. Scent of Cedar I

    Scent of Cedar I New Member

    When our difficult child was home one time? And was being so lazy I could not stand it? I told him to mow the lawn. When I came home from work, I saw that the lawn had indeed been mowed, and thought I had done a pretty good thing.


    I found out difficult child had paid the kid next door $20 to mow the lawn.


    This was some years back.

    For $20?

    I would have mowed that grass myself!


  9. Hound dog

    Hound dog Nana's are Beautiful

    He's living at home, right?

    How about using his stomach against him? When Travis refuses to help around here I hit him where it hurts, his stomach. He's not allowed a bite of food til he does what was asked of him.

    Food is a great motivator for Travis. lmao Let's just say he has yet to go without a meal.

    It's tough when they don't have anything constructive to do with their time.

  10. Jen

    Jen New Member

    Baby positive steps. We know though he cannot pick and choose when he is going to do what is required. Well he can, but with consequences.