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Update...yeesh.
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<blockquote data-quote="PonyGirl65" data-source="post: 682095" data-attributes="member: 20087"><p>Just wanted to chime in and say I know right exactly where you are at, as far as paying the bill <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> I always felt like I needed to 'reward' 'changed behavior'....anything that I saw as 'progress', I needed to do the next thing to help him out. In my mind, I always thought it was 'encouragement' .... not 'enabling'. And I still feel that way today.</p><p></p><p>One thing, maybe, to keep in mind as the month goes on, is try to think of the words you will say as the next electric bill gets closer. "I know you'll figure a way to pay this on your own", "I'm sure you'll handle it," are some suggestions. Or maybe even "Well at least it's warmer outside now" or "Isn't it nice that it stays light later in the day".... ;-) I would try my best to avoid statements like "I told you so" or "if you didn't have free-loaders" or anything of that nature.</p><p></p><p>I think it could be helpful, in this 'middle' time, for you to be thinking of worst-case scenario, and how you will respond to that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="PonyGirl65, post: 682095, member: 20087"] Just wanted to chime in and say I know right exactly where you are at, as far as paying the bill :-) I always felt like I needed to 'reward' 'changed behavior'....anything that I saw as 'progress', I needed to do the next thing to help him out. In my mind, I always thought it was 'encouragement' .... not 'enabling'. And I still feel that way today. One thing, maybe, to keep in mind as the month goes on, is try to think of the words you will say as the next electric bill gets closer. "I know you'll figure a way to pay this on your own", "I'm sure you'll handle it," are some suggestions. Or maybe even "Well at least it's warmer outside now" or "Isn't it nice that it stays light later in the day".... ;-) I would try my best to avoid statements like "I told you so" or "if you didn't have free-loaders" or anything of that nature. I think it could be helpful, in this 'middle' time, for you to be thinking of worst-case scenario, and how you will respond to that. [/QUOTE]
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