Hello everyone. I am sorry not to have posted earlier but I have had a lot on my proverbial plate!
difficult child and I had a youth offending officer around on Thursday. Things started ok... I asked if they would prefer it if I was not there, stuck the kettle on, stuck my head you know where and just kind of sat and listened. Atleast my difficult child knows her rights now should she reoffend?
The chap was a nice older man, had kids and came across as wanting to help not point a guilty finger at difficult child for her fraud.
He had to build up a profile, which meant asking questions from a sheet and filling in grey areas with his own Qs. It was all going quite well until I said that this was an ongoing problem, not a recent teenage issue. I kept really calm and tried to kindly explain about difficult children colouring/ additive reactions, difficulties we'd had since dot and how I had blamed myself and tried endless ways to overcome our hurdles. I am not perfect, I know that. I have given all I have though and tried to be as understanding as humanly possible but I keep meeting a brick wall. difficult child told me it was my fault for not disciplining her enough!!! She also told the YOT that my mum ( who idolises her ) was an ****** liar and two faced ****** *****? This was because I brought up the occassion when difficult child had told her work colleagues that we were force feeding her.... She had come in late one night, was arguing with her chums on text and instant messenger at the same time and boldly told me that she hadn't eaten for 3 days ( I doubt it ). I said that her dinner was in the microwave and she really should eat it( nicely ). She carried on the argument, getting more and more wound up. I said that she should eat her dinner or come off of the computer as an hour had passed, she could eat at the computer if she wished, not a problem, but it was important to get some food in her to think clearly. She was only 15 at the time. That was me force feeding her. My mum was working at the same hotel at the time and overheard her force feeding statement and rang me later to establish what had happened.
Anyway, she stormed off, we have some help in the pipeline and I have been given the number of a parental support worker.
Later that evening difficult child informs me that I don't support her and I can jog on basically. I fear I may have nicked a nerve.
9pm and I get a call from my mums friend. She cant get grandad to answer the phone and he has been compaining of chest pains. 8 mile drive to his house, mum like a headless chicken, his house in darkness and no response. Call the police out, get into grandads home and eventually find him collapsed on the bedroom floor, covered in blood and clearly not well. The easy child phoned an ambulance who couldn't arrive quick enough so the fire brigagde and the rapid response team arrived in red jump suits shortly followed by two paramedics! Piccadilly circus
. We eventually got him into hospital and safe at midnight, waited for the on call doctor to assess him and settled him down. I got in at 01.30 totally exhausted but running on adrenalin. It was frightening what had happened but I kept my cool and took charge of the situation. Grandad is in a safe place and we did everything right for him. He hopes to be out tomorrow but will have to have more tests first. Bless him. Bad experience as it was, it was a welcome break/distraction from difficult child and good to feel useful and effective.
That was my Valentines night. I hope you all had a more romantic time than I did! LOL!!!
Dizzier by the minute!!
difficult child and I had a youth offending officer around on Thursday. Things started ok... I asked if they would prefer it if I was not there, stuck the kettle on, stuck my head you know where and just kind of sat and listened. Atleast my difficult child knows her rights now should she reoffend?
The chap was a nice older man, had kids and came across as wanting to help not point a guilty finger at difficult child for her fraud.
He had to build up a profile, which meant asking questions from a sheet and filling in grey areas with his own Qs. It was all going quite well until I said that this was an ongoing problem, not a recent teenage issue. I kept really calm and tried to kindly explain about difficult children colouring/ additive reactions, difficulties we'd had since dot and how I had blamed myself and tried endless ways to overcome our hurdles. I am not perfect, I know that. I have given all I have though and tried to be as understanding as humanly possible but I keep meeting a brick wall. difficult child told me it was my fault for not disciplining her enough!!! She also told the YOT that my mum ( who idolises her ) was an ****** liar and two faced ****** *****? This was because I brought up the occassion when difficult child had told her work colleagues that we were force feeding her.... She had come in late one night, was arguing with her chums on text and instant messenger at the same time and boldly told me that she hadn't eaten for 3 days ( I doubt it ). I said that her dinner was in the microwave and she really should eat it( nicely ). She carried on the argument, getting more and more wound up. I said that she should eat her dinner or come off of the computer as an hour had passed, she could eat at the computer if she wished, not a problem, but it was important to get some food in her to think clearly. She was only 15 at the time. That was me force feeding her. My mum was working at the same hotel at the time and overheard her force feeding statement and rang me later to establish what had happened.
Anyway, she stormed off, we have some help in the pipeline and I have been given the number of a parental support worker.
Later that evening difficult child informs me that I don't support her and I can jog on basically. I fear I may have nicked a nerve.
9pm and I get a call from my mums friend. She cant get grandad to answer the phone and he has been compaining of chest pains. 8 mile drive to his house, mum like a headless chicken, his house in darkness and no response. Call the police out, get into grandads home and eventually find him collapsed on the bedroom floor, covered in blood and clearly not well. The easy child phoned an ambulance who couldn't arrive quick enough so the fire brigagde and the rapid response team arrived in red jump suits shortly followed by two paramedics! Piccadilly circus
. We eventually got him into hospital and safe at midnight, waited for the on call doctor to assess him and settled him down. I got in at 01.30 totally exhausted but running on adrenalin. It was frightening what had happened but I kept my cool and took charge of the situation. Grandad is in a safe place and we did everything right for him. He hopes to be out tomorrow but will have to have more tests first. Bless him. Bad experience as it was, it was a welcome break/distraction from difficult child and good to feel useful and effective.That was my Valentines night. I hope you all had a more romantic time than I did! LOL!!!
Dizzier by the minute!!
