Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Update
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Scent of Cedar *" data-source="post: 615240" data-attributes="member: 17461"><p>Morning, Recovering :O)</p><p></p><p>husband is picking up, too. I always tell him when you ask about him. I think he likes that. Men can be so stubborn about telling anyone the hard parts of their lives. Knowing that he is being thought of and asked about and considered with compassion and understanding has been so helpful to him. </p><p></p><p>So, the magic of what happens, here on the site, works even if the person needing comfort and clarity is only receiving those gifts second hand.</p><p></p><p>*********</p><p></p><p>difficult child daughter does seem to have upped the ante, Recovering. She has gone no contact. husband and I were discussing, last night. If she has gone back to the streets, or if she has been hurt or whatever...all the more reason for us to have stuck to our guns regarding granddaughter's living arrangements.</p><p></p><p>For those reading along? I would like you to know that detaching from the emotional blackmail that is enabling gets easier, once you are able to see that link between enabling and the adult child continuing to fall. All at once, I am seeing a cold eyed manipulation, where before I saw a helpless child, crying to be saved. It's a strange, strange feeling. I question that part of myself that seems to have come awake and that refuses to see anything but what is really going on. Truly, I am so shocked at what I see in my children. It is just as Recovering, and on other threads, MWM, Janet, Nancy, and everywoman have been telling us. Hard to see, impossible to acknowledge ~ but boy, once you choose to see it for what it really is? It is so easy to change it.</p><p></p><p>difficult child daughter will probably need help to start over. The difference here is that if she goes back to the streets this time? Instead of falling apart, I am going to know that she would have done the same thing eventually, whatever we did. </p><p></p><p>If she has gone back to the streets? husband and I will feel we have dodged a bullet.</p><p></p><p>Thanks to each of you, and especially, to you Recovering, for staying the course with me.</p><p></p><p>Cedar</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Scent of Cedar *, post: 615240, member: 17461"] Morning, Recovering :O) husband is picking up, too. I always tell him when you ask about him. I think he likes that. Men can be so stubborn about telling anyone the hard parts of their lives. Knowing that he is being thought of and asked about and considered with compassion and understanding has been so helpful to him. So, the magic of what happens, here on the site, works even if the person needing comfort and clarity is only receiving those gifts second hand. ********* difficult child daughter does seem to have upped the ante, Recovering. She has gone no contact. husband and I were discussing, last night. If she has gone back to the streets, or if she has been hurt or whatever...all the more reason for us to have stuck to our guns regarding granddaughter's living arrangements. For those reading along? I would like you to know that detaching from the emotional blackmail that is enabling gets easier, once you are able to see that link between enabling and the adult child continuing to fall. All at once, I am seeing a cold eyed manipulation, where before I saw a helpless child, crying to be saved. It's a strange, strange feeling. I question that part of myself that seems to have come awake and that refuses to see anything but what is really going on. Truly, I am so shocked at what I see in my children. It is just as Recovering, and on other threads, MWM, Janet, Nancy, and everywoman have been telling us. Hard to see, impossible to acknowledge ~ but boy, once you choose to see it for what it really is? It is so easy to change it. difficult child daughter will probably need help to start over. The difference here is that if she goes back to the streets this time? Instead of falling apart, I am going to know that she would have done the same thing eventually, whatever we did. If she has gone back to the streets? husband and I will feel we have dodged a bullet. Thanks to each of you, and especially, to you Recovering, for staying the course with me. Cedar [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
Update
Top