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Urgent Advice Needed!
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<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 614181" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>lar, my experience with my own difficult child is that she does NOT hear anything that she doesn't want to hear. She does not prepare, she does not plan and she does not think about the future. So, if you know your daughter to be similar, just saying you are moving alone without them and they need to find low income housing, may not be enough. You may get to moving day and lo and behold, the two of them are crying and drama will ensue and you will be manipulated into doing something you don't want to do. If you can realistically walk away from that drama and let them literally live on the street, then certainly move forward knowing you have the strength to walk away. However, if in the past you have caved and given in, and since past behavior dictates future behavior, you will be in a very uncomfortable situation. </p><p></p><p>I am not sure what you can do other then perhaps assist them in finding housing, handing them a list of shelters, giving them boxes to begin packing, forcing them to start putting their belongings in those boxes so your intention is very clear................but I believe the most important thing is that you realize you may be confronted with drama on your way out the door and prepare for that with the resolve that no matter what happens, you are leaving without them. Many of our kids live in a fantasy world with high doses of magical thinking, so your reality may not be theirs. Good luck.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 614181, member: 13542"] lar, my experience with my own difficult child is that she does NOT hear anything that she doesn't want to hear. She does not prepare, she does not plan and she does not think about the future. So, if you know your daughter to be similar, just saying you are moving alone without them and they need to find low income housing, may not be enough. You may get to moving day and lo and behold, the two of them are crying and drama will ensue and you will be manipulated into doing something you don't want to do. If you can realistically walk away from that drama and let them literally live on the street, then certainly move forward knowing you have the strength to walk away. However, if in the past you have caved and given in, and since past behavior dictates future behavior, you will be in a very uncomfortable situation. I am not sure what you can do other then perhaps assist them in finding housing, handing them a list of shelters, giving them boxes to begin packing, forcing them to start putting their belongings in those boxes so your intention is very clear................but I believe the most important thing is that you realize you may be confronted with drama on your way out the door and prepare for that with the resolve that no matter what happens, you are leaving without them. Many of our kids live in a fantasy world with high doses of magical thinking, so your reality may not be theirs. Good luck. [/QUOTE]
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