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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 761869" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>You know Newstart I have a hobby. Actually I have two hobbies that are deeply important to me. One of them I will tell you about. It is Portuguese Fado music. Fado means fate in Portuguese. Let me tell you about Fado music. I am listening as I write. Actually I am nearly always listening. I have to force myself to turn it off in order to go to sleep.</p><p></p><p>I will tell you a couple of reasons this is coming to mind right now. Fado is the soundtrack of my life. I mean, it doesn't talk about the history per se of my life--but of life--everybody's life. It gets right down to it. In the most expressive, eloquent, heartfelt, sad, mournful, loving way. It's as if all of the people who have ever lived, their voices as they hoped and cried, and yearned, and lost--were put into a cauldron and it would end up as Fado music. OMG Fado music drowns out my sorrow and replaces it with joy. It just digs right down into my core and turns me inside out. When I listen, it's impossible to be sad. Impossible to feel discontent. Impossible to even worry about my son. I am happy when I listen. Because I am nearly always listening I am nearly always happy. It's such a cheap thrill. Well, Spotify costs something.</p><p></p><p>So right now I am relating this to you: If you think about it, except for a few things, all life is is blah, blah, blah. One of those red letter things is LOVE. I know you have great agony. I will not diminish it, because I KNOW agony. But the thing is--all of this lying of your daughter is blah, blah, blah.</p><p></p><p>Is there a way that you can tune it out and begin hearing your LOVE SONG, your song of love. In that way, your daughter's blah, blah, blah would be drowned out, and all you would know and feel is love. Because that is what I believe about you. I believe you are the most loving of women.</p><p></p><p>And I am wondering right now, something I have never thought about before. I am wondering if you might hold onto this irritation about her lying, because on some level it protects you from feeling your great love for her, and worry about her, and fear you might lose her, too. You have suffered what no mother should. But fearing to feel your great love is to big a price to pay.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 761869, member: 18958"] You know Newstart I have a hobby. Actually I have two hobbies that are deeply important to me. One of them I will tell you about. It is Portuguese Fado music. Fado means fate in Portuguese. Let me tell you about Fado music. I am listening as I write. Actually I am nearly always listening. I have to force myself to turn it off in order to go to sleep. I will tell you a couple of reasons this is coming to mind right now. Fado is the soundtrack of my life. I mean, it doesn't talk about the history per se of my life--but of life--everybody's life. It gets right down to it. In the most expressive, eloquent, heartfelt, sad, mournful, loving way. It's as if all of the people who have ever lived, their voices as they hoped and cried, and yearned, and lost--were put into a cauldron and it would end up as Fado music. OMG Fado music drowns out my sorrow and replaces it with joy. It just digs right down into my core and turns me inside out. When I listen, it's impossible to be sad. Impossible to feel discontent. Impossible to even worry about my son. I am happy when I listen. Because I am nearly always listening I am nearly always happy. It's such a cheap thrill. Well, Spotify costs something. So right now I am relating this to you: If you think about it, except for a few things, all life is is blah, blah, blah. One of those red letter things is LOVE. I know you have great agony. I will not diminish it, because I KNOW agony. But the thing is--all of this lying of your daughter is blah, blah, blah. Is there a way that you can tune it out and begin hearing your LOVE SONG, your song of love. In that way, your daughter's blah, blah, blah would be drowned out, and all you would know and feel is love. Because that is what I believe about you. I believe you are the most loving of women. And I am wondering right now, something I have never thought about before. I am wondering if you might hold onto this irritation about her lying, because on some level it protects you from feeling your great love for her, and worry about her, and fear you might lose her, too. You have suffered what no mother should. But fearing to feel your great love is to big a price to pay. [/QUOTE]
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