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<blockquote data-quote="Fran" data-source="post: 142726" data-attributes="member: 3"><p>Lisa, no one can take advantage of you without your permission. Being the head of a family is a tough but good place to be but all great leaders learn to delegate, trust and inspire those who follow them. You want to learn to trust your kids to function as adults. They will not rise to the challenge if you keep treating them as if they can't do the job as well as you. You need to delegate very specifically to husband. </p><p></p><p>Make a priority list. M IL is getting cared for. She doesn't need you 24/7. Have husband stay 2hrs, easy child for 2hrs, nicole for 2hrs and then let the poor lady rest. You don't need to run after doctors but have him call you. </p><p></p><p>There is no reason Travis and Nicole can not help with the dogs, dishes and Aubrey. You are not the primary caretaker of Darin or Aubrey. They need to find some other supports besides you if you want to fulfill your goal of completing school and getting a job. If Travis and Nicole are competant enough to work and have a child they are compatant enough to do the dishes. No excuses. Everyone else in the world takes care of baby, goes to school and does their dishes. EVERY DAY. Why would you let Nicole not learn that life lesson? </p><p></p><p>I don't know what to say about your utilities being shut off. </p><p></p><p>If you want to be a good leader, put everyone in charge of something and don't try to show that you are the only one who can do anything well enough. It undermines their self image and fosters dependency. </p><p></p><p>Keep your eye on the goal.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Fran, post: 142726, member: 3"] Lisa, no one can take advantage of you without your permission. Being the head of a family is a tough but good place to be but all great leaders learn to delegate, trust and inspire those who follow them. You want to learn to trust your kids to function as adults. They will not rise to the challenge if you keep treating them as if they can't do the job as well as you. You need to delegate very specifically to husband. Make a priority list. M IL is getting cared for. She doesn't need you 24/7. Have husband stay 2hrs, easy child for 2hrs, nicole for 2hrs and then let the poor lady rest. You don't need to run after doctors but have him call you. There is no reason Travis and Nicole can not help with the dogs, dishes and Aubrey. You are not the primary caretaker of Darin or Aubrey. They need to find some other supports besides you if you want to fulfill your goal of completing school and getting a job. If Travis and Nicole are competant enough to work and have a child they are compatant enough to do the dishes. No excuses. Everyone else in the world takes care of baby, goes to school and does their dishes. EVERY DAY. Why would you let Nicole not learn that life lesson? I don't know what to say about your utilities being shut off. If you want to be a good leader, put everyone in charge of something and don't try to show that you are the only one who can do anything well enough. It undermines their self image and fosters dependency. Keep your eye on the goal. [/QUOTE]
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