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Parent Emeritus
Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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<blockquote data-quote="Tanya M" data-source="post: 640166" data-attributes="member: 18516"><p>Good Morning Lil, I hope you were able to get a good nights rest. Our difficult child's can be so exhausting!!</p><p></p><p></p><p>I don't think you need to feel bad about what you said, you spoke the truth. What is key here you are tired of the "I'm such a victim" attitude.</p><p></p><p>I know that feeling all too well. My difficult child always blames others and then follows up with what he "deserves". It's that double whammy of victim/entitlement attitude. I pray that someday my difficult child will stop blaming others for how screwed up his life is and he will start accepting responsibility for his own actions. Until that happens for him and so many like him, their lives will continue to spiral out of control. Until they are able to stop blaming others they will never be successful at holding down a job or have a meaningful relationship. My difficult child has had several good jobs but he could only last a few months, 6 at the most. He would either quit because of his arrogant attitude or get fired because of the same. It dumb founded me when he would complain about his boss saying "the guys an idiot and doesn't know the first thing about running a business", yes he would say things like this about people who had been in business 20, 30 even 40 years.</p><p></p><p>I got to the point with my difficult child that I stopped offering any advice because it just made him more angry and he would go into a tirade about why that would never work, or that he had already tried it and it didn't work. I would listen to him and just very simply say things like "I'm really sorry you are having such a tough time" It really helped me to detach.</p><p></p><p>I know you love your son, you wouldn't be hurting the way you are if you didn't but you need to love yourself too. Take some time to do something good for YOU.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Tanya M, post: 640166, member: 18516"] Good Morning Lil, I hope you were able to get a good nights rest. Our difficult child's can be so exhausting!! I don't think you need to feel bad about what you said, you spoke the truth. What is key here you are tired of the "I'm such a victim" attitude. I know that feeling all too well. My difficult child always blames others and then follows up with what he "deserves". It's that double whammy of victim/entitlement attitude. I pray that someday my difficult child will stop blaming others for how screwed up his life is and he will start accepting responsibility for his own actions. Until that happens for him and so many like him, their lives will continue to spiral out of control. Until they are able to stop blaming others they will never be successful at holding down a job or have a meaningful relationship. My difficult child has had several good jobs but he could only last a few months, 6 at the most. He would either quit because of his arrogant attitude or get fired because of the same. It dumb founded me when he would complain about his boss saying "the guys an idiot and doesn't know the first thing about running a business", yes he would say things like this about people who had been in business 20, 30 even 40 years. I got to the point with my difficult child that I stopped offering any advice because it just made him more angry and he would go into a tirade about why that would never work, or that he had already tried it and it didn't work. I would listen to him and just very simply say things like "I'm really sorry you are having such a tough time" It really helped me to detach. I know you love your son, you wouldn't be hurting the way you are if you didn't but you need to love yourself too. Take some time to do something good for YOU. [/QUOTE]
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Venting, updating, just very conflicted right now.
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