Very LONG list of new words for those who like the Kids Dictionary words!

Discussion in 'The Watercooler' started by Tiapet, May 6, 2012.

  1. Tiapet

    Tiapet Old Hand

    I apologize ahead IF I did duplicate any with this one. I've been saving them up and even searched out to find them so I'm hoping I didn't duplicate any. This list is long. So without further ado.......here is your new list for today! :)

    ORPHANDUSTRIOUSNESS n:Huge productivity increase parent experiences when no kids are with them.

    POPPALARITY n: High approval rating enjoyed by dads who let kids eat more junk, watch more TV, etc. than mom.

    WOUNDOGGLE v:To pretend to be hurt after hurting someone else with hopes that you won’t get in trouble.

    SHTUNKER n:Kid who puts something in the toilet that doesn't belong there (or takes something out).

    JOCKERING n:Relentless arguing that occurs after every play when kids play a sport unsupervised.

    FRIENDSOMNIA (n.): Lack of sleep that takes place during a kids "Sleepover".

    SUBTATTLE v:When child reprimands sibling in loud voice with primary goal of alerting parents.

    KEDTUSIONS n:Injuries sustained from being kicked while trying to tie a toddler’s shoes.

    SIESTIVAL n:The celebration, however small, that ensues when your kid goes down for a nap.

    ARITHMATRIX (n) Point at which your child's math assignments surpass your math ability.

    MESSTIBULE n: Clutter of coats &and backpacks littering the area by front door after school.

    WHYARRHEA n:A child’s string of questions rattled off in rapid-fire succession.

    MALLOWMINE(v) To eat only the marshmallows in Lucky Charms Cereal.

    PELCH v:When kid who can't read rattles off series of random letters and asks what it spells.

    STOCKTEASE n:Kid who lets you buy a ton of their fave food and then decides they don’t like it anymore.

    INVISIBOOBOO n:place on kids body you unnecessarily put band-aid when they got hurt but didn't bleed.

    JUVENELOQUENCE n : When kiddie words invade your adult vocabulary. (eg:“I have to go potty.”)

    BUNNYCOMB v:To frantically search house for kid’s fave stuffed animal to avoid meltdown.

    MOMBIE n: Mother who embodies Zombie-like qualities after months of sleep deprivation.

    DOVE CRYv: The emphatic and immediate need for a towel that overcomes child with soap in their eyes.

    THUMBLE(v) When a child speaks incoherently with their fingers in their mouth.

    INTOILANCE(n) A child’s need to go to the bathroom at the least opportune time.

    SHRAM v:To try to put on sneakers with laces still tied from last time they were worn.

    PEEHEARSAL n.: One of the frequent false alarms that take place during potty-training.

    DISTRACTIVITIES n.: Pointless, mindless tasks designed to occupy a toddler.

    ****ISTICS n.: Wildly inaccurate stats spouted by an 8 year old at a sporting event.

    SHAMPEST n:Child who’ll go upstairs and barge in on showering mom to ask for cup of milk when dad's in the kitchen.

    SNOOT v.: To suck in rather than blow out when blowing your nose.

    PETSWAP (v) Often ill-fated attempt to sneakily replace a dead goldfish (gerbil, etc…).

    GRENEGG To gag and wretch while trying new food prior to it getting anywhere near mouth.

    KIDGILANTE n:Child who alerts you when you do something contrary to the law (e.g:Go thru yellow light, speed).

    RANTONESE n: Language of harrumphing and angry muttering by child who just got punished.

    PREMIGY n:Infant or toddler whose merest action has parents convinced he's future genius or pro athlete.

    MISCROSS(v) To fail to look both ways til you’re halfway across the street.
    .
    CRYDENTITY CRISI n:Hush that falls over group of moms determining if crying sound nearby is their kid.

    CLANDESDINE v:To hide from kids while eating a treat so they won’t ask for one too.

    MUNCHKISS v: To eat the icing off a doughnut or cupcake and then put it back.

    YELEGATE v : To scold another person’s child.

    MOMBIE n: Mother who embodies Zombie-like qualities after months of sleep deprivation

    KNICKNOCK v: To riddle a grownup with a series of impossibly tedious knock-knock jokes.

    CASTFLATION n:Challenge faced by kids of celebs to succeed in show biz without people crying nepotism.

    OVERBUB v: Waste liquid soap by putting on hands and promptly rinsing off without creating a lather.

    SLUMBERCRACK n:Narrow sliver of mattress you must sleep on if kid weasels way into your bed.

    MACOUSTICS (n) Frequency of a mother’s voice that her children find so easy to ignore.

    STANKTUARY n.: A parents use of the bathroom as a place to hide for a while from their kids.

    DOUGHBY n:Child who only likes the crust of the pizza but will not eat crust of the sandwich.

    DUPTRITION n:parents attempts to sneak healthy supplements into foods their kids are willing to eat.

    CYCLOMAGNETISM: Gravitational pull causing kid Learning to ride bike to veer into large stationery objects.

    NAPSMEAR n:When someone or something brings your kid’s nap to a premature end.

    HARRASK(v) To riddle someone with same question over and over with hopes answer will change from no to yes.

    SNOTSAM (n) Any unidentified sticky substance relating to kids.

    BLUBBERNECKER n: Stranger who stands and gawks when a child is having a tantrum.

    DROPPLER EFFECT n:Uneasy feeling parent endures watching toddler walking with full glass of juice.

    KEGULATE v:To ponder cost of college for kids, recalling that you mostly drank beer there.

    AMUSELESS adj:When a kid has thousands of toys,games,books and crafts yet there is “nothing to do”.

    PHANTOMOLITION (v.) When something gets broken but no one did it.

    BOOTALITY(n): Notion that “keep your hands to yourself” means it’s still ok to kick.

    BOOGERANG n: Small morsel excreted from nose that you can’t get off finger no matter how hard u flick.

    WASPTUSI (n.) The frantic dance of a frightened kid trying to elude a bee.

    FLOORCLOSE:To obstruct family room’s main thoroughfare with a shoddily-constructed tower of blocks.

    KIDJOURN v:To avoid conversation with another adult by pretending your child needs your attention.

    SERRAID v:Awkward task of reaching across table to cut food on kid’s plate.

    FLUICIDE n:To care for sick kid, knowing it will likely result in your catching it too.

    HOARDGAME n:Long-neglected plaything a kid develops interest in when mom says she’s getting rid of it.

    CONFLAKE v:To dig down in the cereal box and abscond the toy surprise.

    FECALARITY n:Comic force that causes kid to laugh himself to the floor at mere mention of the word “poop”.

    RERUNT n:Child who’ll watch the same episodes of a TV show over & over with out getting bored of them.

    SLOBBERTIZE v:To use spit on a napkin to clean something off kid’s face when you are not near a sink. and

    SCRIBNOTES n:Battle scars worn by home’s walls and furnishings inflicted by marker-wielding kid.

    ETHIOPULENCE adj:State of good fortune taken for granted by every kid with a roof over their head and food to eat,

    SUPPERCATE v:To take to bites of dinner and then request dessert.

    VEGEVICT (v): To adamantly insist that food you not like be removed from your plate completely and immediately.

    ASSAULT ‘N BATTER v.: To be informed at 8 AM that you have to bake 50 cupcakes for that day’s class party.

    DISHCOVETRY n: When a kid finds your dinner more pleasing to the palate than their own.

    RIDICRIMAND v:To make incredibly empty threats to your kids. eg:“If you don’t stop that! … NO MORE AIR!”.

    TARDY CRASHER n.:A kid who’ll do absolutely anything to keep from going to bed.

    WETSOXITY n:Magnetic-like force that draws kids without boots on into puddles.

    OREOSIS: The unquenchable hunger for desserts.

    ORPHANDUSTRIOUSNESS n:Huge productivity increase parent experiences when no kids are with them.

    JEMIMA CLAUSE n:Leniency in dietary code letting pancakes be "Breakfast" not "Dessert".

    MOMSACE(mom-SOTCH-ee) n: New mom fashion of unwashed hair,spit up on shirt,puffy eyes,etc.

    TRASHCANNAISSANCE MISSION v:To retrieve important items from the garbage that your toddler threw away for fun.ith

    FULLISH: To be too full to eat more carrots but have plenty of room for dessert.

    LIBRIDO (n.): A man’s disdain for literature about parenting.

    KIDDILAC n:Car totally pimped with school stickers,boosters,toys,filth and other evidence of kids.

    TOTAL FREAKALL n: A child’s rock solid memory of things you really want them to forget.

    CHINA SYNDROME: Kid's dire need to drink only from 1 special cup or eat off 1 special plate.

    WINNERGY n.: Notion that every team should get a trophy no matter how bad they suck.

    SANTASTROPHE(n) Misconception that baby will enjoy being handed to huge bearded stranger in blood red suit for xmas picture.

    DAWDEFY v: A child’s show of power, doing what you tell him to do as sloooowly as he possibly can.

    FILTHLETE (n): Kid who goes out of their way to get sports uniform as dirty as possible.

    REMBITIOUS adj: Belief that you can accomplish much more while your kids nap than is actually feasible.

    CRESTICKLES n: Smears of kids’ toothpaste all over the bathroom sink, counter.and mirror.

    YAPPYMEAL n.: Commotion inside a car when kids are shouting out what they want from the FastFood Drive Thru.

    NOPEN:When kid pulls car door handle as you try to auto-unlock so his door stays locked and you have to unlock again.

    SLACKULATE(v): To wipe your hands on your pants while there’s a napkin resting on your lap.

    COOPHORIA n.: The opiate-like contentment a parent feels with their new baby in their arms.

    HUGBY n: Surprise hug from toddler who grabs you around your knees from behind almost knocking you down.

    SKEECH v: To casually grasp sides of gas station toilet bowl (or anything really gross).

    BOREGASM: Lame unromantic sex sometimes endured when not in mood but trying to get pregnant.

    DADUATION n:painful realization that you are quickly and irreversibly turning into your parents.

    CHOCOMMOTION n:State of unrest brought on by hordes of kids wired on Halloween.

    KOTUCK (KOH-tuck) v:When man carries feminine hygiene product in his pocket so wife doesn’t have to bring a purse.

    JUNKFEUD n:Endless battle waged by parents to urge/convince/trick kids into eating healthfully.

    LULLACRY (n) Dramatic pause between a child getting #hurt and beginning to wail.

    KINTERPRET v : When parent repeats or translates everything their kid says to other grownups.

    SCARBER n: Kid who takes it upon himself to cut his own hair or that of a sibling.

    MOMICOPTER n. Mother who's detrimentally attentive to and overprotective of her child.

    CUSPENSATION n:Nerve-racking process of exchanging money for kids tooth under pillow in the dark with out waking them.

    TOUGH SHIFT n:The Stay at Home Mom’s inability to call in sick to work.

    CHOUNTDOWN n: The number of bites of a healthy food kid must take to qualify for dessert.

    MOMFISCATE v:Child’s act of finding and taking back an item that was taken away.

    FAITHIEST is Someone who believes in God, but can’t believe they believe in God.

    POPSTACLES n:parentally-imposed chores or hygiene practices that stand btwn kid and something they want.

    PASTOVERS(n) Food items that come home in lunchbox uneaten.

    HURLYBIRD n: Child who willingly spins their self around in a swivel chair til they puke.

    GARMINX n: A little girl who feels compelled to change her clothes 50 times a day.

    VALEN-TRYIN’S DAY: Holiday recognized by Men with women who are never satisfied with their Valentines Day efforts.

    BROFFITI v.:To scribble on a younger sibling with permanent magic marker.

    BUFFOODERY n:Swiftness with which boy returns to eating with mouth open after you scold him to stop.

    SANDROID n:Kid at beach who's completely unfazed by the sand that fills every crevice of his body.

    KNUCKLET n: Baby on endless quest to stuff whole fist in her mouth.

    PARDUNCE n: Child who is completely incapable of taking even the remotest responsibility for his actions.

    NOPEFULNESS adj: A 7y.o’s knee-jerk compulsion to disagree with everything his parents say.

    HAMPURGLAR n: Parent who lets their child wear an article of clothing out of the dirty pile.

    WRAPPETITE n: When child is interested in eating something due to allure of its snazzy packaging.

    SKOFFSPRING n : Adolescent child who’s reached the conclusion that their parents are stupid.

    BEANBAGGER n: Kid who smuggles his vegetables from dinner table to wastebasket in bathroom.

    CENSURF To extra-quickly change channel when are in room and inappropriate scene comes on.

    MANAJERK (n): Sports coach who's partial and preferential to his own kid and can’t see YOUR kid is REALLY the star.

    WICH HUNTER n: A child with an intense aversion to bread crusts.

    COOCHIE-COOTION n.: The sheer exhilaration/immense terror of being mercilessly tickled.

    PAMPERODEO n :The difficult chore of diapering a relentlessly squirming baby.

    TAE-BOWING: Where every time you see someone Tebowing you kick them in their head.
     
  2. Star*

    Star* call 911........call 911

    KIDALAC - AMEN! - can you get ONE more sticker about your PERFECT kid on the back of that MINIVAN? makes me want to draw moustaches and add clubs and pitchforks to those perfect smiling stickpeople family.

    Saw one today that I actually would have put on my car - It was the stickpeople - but they were dysfunctional.....Dad was a pirate, Mom was a pirate,,,,,and son was standing there like he was mad at the world. (pirate) even the dogs were skeletons. IT WAS cool......but still awesome.
     
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