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Substance Abuse
Visit with difficult child at halfway house
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 642928" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I love the phrase "it is what it is."</p><p></p><p>And he is what he is.</p><p></p><p>You accomplished what you wanted to do. You saw your son and gave him further proof that you do love him. </p><p></p><p>You also could not do what is not possible. You did not cure him, whatever is wrong. I think most of our adult kiddos have personality disorders from borderline (mostly the gals), to narcissistic to antisocial. At this time, the later two are not treatable, but borderline was not treatable until just recently when a brilliant mind found a type of therapy that works well for hard working, motivated borderlines who WANT to change. There is always hope where there is life. </p><p></p><p>I also found a nice motivational quote today on the calandar I bought my daughter for her college dorm. Maybe it will give you some peace. It did me: "The past is over. Learn from it. The future is not here yet. Plan for it. The present is now. LIVE IT!"</p><p></p><p>I find that focusing on "now", not thinking back to what was, and not thinking too hard about the future either (as I can't predict it) actually works best for me. The facts are, you visited your son, it went ok, and now you can move on with whatever you need to do NOW.</p><p></p><p>I hope your son decides to a least become substance free. </p><p><em><strong>Today he is not using.</strong></em></p><p>Celebrate today <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 642928, member: 1550"] I love the phrase "it is what it is." And he is what he is. You accomplished what you wanted to do. You saw your son and gave him further proof that you do love him. You also could not do what is not possible. You did not cure him, whatever is wrong. I think most of our adult kiddos have personality disorders from borderline (mostly the gals), to narcissistic to antisocial. At this time, the later two are not treatable, but borderline was not treatable until just recently when a brilliant mind found a type of therapy that works well for hard working, motivated borderlines who WANT to change. There is always hope where there is life. I also found a nice motivational quote today on the calandar I bought my daughter for her college dorm. Maybe it will give you some peace. It did me: "The past is over. Learn from it. The future is not here yet. Plan for it. The present is now. LIVE IT!" I find that focusing on "now", not thinking back to what was, and not thinking too hard about the future either (as I can't predict it) actually works best for me. The facts are, you visited your son, it went ok, and now you can move on with whatever you need to do NOW. I hope your son decides to a least become substance free. [I][B]Today he is not using.[/B][/I] Celebrate today :) [/QUOTE]
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Visit with difficult child at halfway house
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