Waiting for a bed at the psychiatric hospital ...

Discussion in 'General Parenting' started by pajamas, Jan 17, 2012.

  1. pajamas

    pajamas Member

    CeCe has just fallen asleep after pitching a fit for 3 hours. Again. tonight. Except that today she started at 7 so it's ending a little earlier - yesterday she started about this time. Her psychiatrist is waiting to admit her, if only another child's parents would pick her up - she was discharged hours ago but they are having "car trouble" (or maybe hoping to stretch it for just one more quiet night).

    husband sat up with her while she screamed and wrecked things in her room. He doesn't get it that she'll quiet down sooner if you don't give her anything to respond to, so he escalates things without knowing he's doing it. And now he's saying "she's asleep, nothing we can do." Like H***!, when the doctor calls, throw her butt into the car - she doesn't have to be awake to be admitted! Which he'll eventually do when I make a stink (so it'll be my fault and he'll be the good guy).

    And to top it off the guardianship papers are MIA - all of them, so I'm feeling suspicious. It's just the sort of thing that CeCe would destroy if she could. She's deep into the fantasy that she doesn't belong with us and she'd get to go back to her bparents if only we were out of her life. psychiatric hospital says we have to have them unless she's admitted as a "10-13" (same as Baker Act?) even though we provided them last year (ridiculous) - hopefully the psychiatrist will do that.

    Thankfully the psychiatrist does get it and we've got a decent community mental health support team. It's just a long road to racking up the admissions to get her into Residential Treatment Center (RTC). She tends to act out at night, and we have to weigh the benefits of an exhausting hours long admission process IF there's a bed against the lost sleep and lost work the next day.

    Thanks for letting me ramble and rant ...

  2. zaftigmama

    zaftigmama New Member

    Hugs. I hope it all passes quickly for you.
  3. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Hope it goes fast... and you get some relief
  4. rejectedmom

    rejectedmom New Member

    Try to get some sleep. I know it is hard but the phone will wake you should the bed open up tonight. Take care of yourself the best you can. When you are rested, you might be moe clear headed and those papers will reappear. When they do make copies. -RM
  5. pajamas

    pajamas Member

    Yes, a nap is in order ... and then I can wake up even grumpier!

    (and thanks, zaftig, for getting the Emerson quote right - it's rare)
  6. susiestar

    susiestar Roll With It


    I remember those nights and do not envy you. Glad you have a good psychiatrist. When the papers appear, make copies but also scan them into the computer and ptu them on a thumb drive that you keep on a keychain. It can be a lifesaver because they are always with you.

    I hope you can get enough admissions to get her into Residential Treatment Center (RTC) soon. It hoovers that you have to do all of this.
  7. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Did the psychiatric hospital call during the night? Were you able to get her admitted? I'm sorry that it was a bad night. If you can find the guardian papers make copies and keep them in a lock box or something like that, but Susie's idea of scanning them and putting them on a thumb drive is a great idea.
  8. rdland

    rdland New Member

    I hope you were able to get some sleep and get her to php.
  9. pajamas

    pajamas Member

    A little bit of sleep always helps. No call in the night - psychiatric hospital says to call back at 1 today. She screamed she was too tired to go to school this morning, then jumped up and down (shaking the whole house) to prove her point - i wish i had that kind of energy - and went back to bed. husband took Tink to school and Huck took the bus.

    So I'm here alone right now, but MUST leave for work - I'm supposed to host an all-day meeting with outside partners who don't know each other at 9:30 - will try to get out of some of it. Told her, non-confrontationally, I was leaving in 10 minutes and she could have a ride, but it doesn't look like she'll blink.

    I did speak to her community worker to see if she could stop in - unfortunately, K has to be in court. Doesn't advise leaving CeCe alone, but I don't have much alternative. My job is critical here - we could live on it if we had to, and it's where the good insurance comes from.

    ttfn ... time for a call to the school to let them know she won't be there, and paging the psychiatrist again :(

    p.s. did find the most recent court order confirming our custody in 2004 - hopefully it will do for now
  10. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    Did the bed open up at the psychiatric hospital?
  11. pajamas

    pajamas Member

    Finally - about 3:30 pm. Apparently there was some sort of screw up and some of the php patients were given rooms and told to stay. I kept calling and emphasizing how volatile she was, all the threats she was making (not mentioning that I think they are just for effect), and found an advocate who made it happen. Doesn't hurt that our psychiatrist is their primary child psychiatrist, which is why we've been waiting for this smaller psychiatric hospital rather than the big one close by (that she considers a vacation).

    husband was able to come home about an hour after I left, and found her packing a pitiful runaway bag. Her essential items were peanut butter, chips, and cheese. Possibly the bag of vampire stories and word search books near the door was meant to go, too. husband is still at the psychiatric hospital doing the admission, so I won't know until later.

    She calmed down when he told her we were waiting for admission. She wants to be there, wants to be in Residential Treatment Center (RTC). Sometimes, it's "anything is better that you guys!!!"; sometimes, she realizes she needs help. I feel really sad for her. And guiltily glad for the couple of nights of quiet we'll have with just Huck and Tink.
  12. TerryJ2

    TerryJ2 Well-Known Member

    Sending support your way ...
  13. buddy

    buddy New Member

    Glad she got a bed. My son liked it too. But he was really mad at first... said he was going to be mad at me for FIVE days and sure enough, he started talking to me again after five days. three weeks later I finally got to bring him home. yuck I hated it.
  14. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    (hugs) I hope you get some rest tonight. I am glad that you were finally able to get a bed for her. I hope that she receives the help she needs, and that you and husband get some much needed sleep.
  15. pajamas

    pajamas Member

    husband finally got home about a half hour ago - boy they make this difficult! 6+ hours processing a kid who was just there 6 weeks ago and had pre-admitted. She's happy as a clam - looking forward to making new "friends". psychiatrist says he'll apply for Residential Treatment Center (RTC) again tomorrow.

    Now for some rest ...

    (and ... 3 weeks, Buddy? 3 days is more likely on our private insurance, unless we/they can get Medicaid in place)
  16. Estherfromjerusalem

    Estherfromjerusalem Well-Known Member

    Pajamas, forgive me for being flippant. The title of your thread is "waiting for a bed" and when I looked down the list of threads my eye saw "Pajamas waiting for a bed"!!! That made me laugh out loud.

    Love, Esther
  17. pajamas

    pajamas Member


    The moniker derives from my initials, but so often literally true, too - CeCe worst times are often at bed time. (Or maybe those are just the worst for me.)

  18. Bunny

    Bunny Guest

    I'm glad that they got a bed for her and got her admitted. 6 hour admission process? Yikes!! That's a long time.

    Enjoy the quiet, and don't feel guilty about it. Everyone deserves quiet and peace in their homes.
  19. JKF

    JKF Well-Known Member

    Ugggh! I know how horrible the process is! My difficult child was in the hospital 3 times this summer. After being released (against our wishes) the 2nd time we had to bring him back not even one hour later due to the fact that he got home and started raging and freaking out! Although he had just been released it took me over 14 hours to get him readmitted! After that we refused to allow him home again! He's now in a PCR which is like an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) only smaller and (supposedly) more therapeutic. And like your daughter he enjoyed his visits to the psychiatric hospital....made lots of new "friends" and seemed to actually like it there!
  20. StressedM0mma

    StressedM0mma Active Member

    OK, I do have to ask. How do you get your difficult child's admitted? We have taken our difficult child to the psychiatric hospital through the ER when she was raging and tearing the place up, and we were told after 3 hours (and she fell asleep) that we needed to take her home. We did not have a psychiatrist at the time, but even when she raged during her time at the PHP they refused to admit her. (Even after we had to call the police for her hitting husband) They told us that she wasn't suicidal, and even though she was violent, she was not homicidal. I even told them I feared for my safety, and her therapist told me to take all of the knives and scissors and lock them in the trunk of my car. So, what do I need to do when this happens again? (I know it will) She will never admit to being suicidal even if she is. She does not want to go to the psychiatric hospital.