ColleenB
Active Member
I know i haven't been posting any updates, but I guess part of me is hoping that we are moving beyond addictive behaviours. Some days I'm convinced he is is... others I feel scared and am waiting for the worst to happen.
Oldest son is on his own, has been since April, but it looks like he is finally financially doing it, studies loans came in a few weeks back. Of course he didn't pay me anything he borrowed this last month promising he would when the loan came.... but I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
He asked if we would help him get a phone, and as soon much as i wanted to, we didn't. Someone else helped him i guess, as e has one after six months without.
He says he is going to classes, but we would have no way of knowing....he also says he hasn't done drugs since early summer.... again.... I don't know. I do know he has drank and smoked some weed... but I guess compared to cocaine, and whatever else he was using... sigh
We are socializing with friends again....even had people over last week... first time in over a year. And we used to entertain monthly.... so baby steps!
Younger son is working hard and going to university part time. I don't worry too much, as he seems happy and on top of his finances and school so far.
My work is busy and I'm spending time at the youth shelter again on weekends... so life is full.
Do I still have a knot in my gut? You bet. I still feel he isn't going to be able to do school ... he still doesnt have a part time job, and he needs one. I don't want to help him financially anymore. We have so much debt accumulated that will take years to pay off.
I still feel shame when I see his dirty teeth and hair, his unkept appearance... although I think he may be getting slightly less dirty looking? ? He said he was going as Jesus for Halloween.. he totally looks the part. Sigh
Just thought I would let you know where we are at
C
Oldest son is on his own, has been since April, but it looks like he is finally financially doing it, studies loans came in a few weeks back. Of course he didn't pay me anything he borrowed this last month promising he would when the loan came.... but I guess I shouldn't be surprised.
He asked if we would help him get a phone, and as soon much as i wanted to, we didn't. Someone else helped him i guess, as e has one after six months without.
He says he is going to classes, but we would have no way of knowing....he also says he hasn't done drugs since early summer.... again.... I don't know. I do know he has drank and smoked some weed... but I guess compared to cocaine, and whatever else he was using... sigh
We are socializing with friends again....even had people over last week... first time in over a year. And we used to entertain monthly.... so baby steps!
Younger son is working hard and going to university part time. I don't worry too much, as he seems happy and on top of his finances and school so far.
My work is busy and I'm spending time at the youth shelter again on weekends... so life is full.
Do I still have a knot in my gut? You bet. I still feel he isn't going to be able to do school ... he still doesnt have a part time job, and he needs one. I don't want to help him financially anymore. We have so much debt accumulated that will take years to pay off.
I still feel shame when I see his dirty teeth and hair, his unkept appearance... although I think he may be getting slightly less dirty looking? ? He said he was going as Jesus for Halloween.. he totally looks the part. Sigh
Just thought I would let you know where we are at
C