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Welcome to my pity party.
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 503266" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>Slept for about 3 hours last night and finally gave up after tossing and turning for an hour and came downstairs at 5am. </p><p></p><p>All I could think about is how much I feel like I'm failing because difficult child 1 fell flat on his face this semester. I don't know that there's any one reason his grades dropped and for the first time he actually FAILED a class. Maybe because I didn't hover, I believed him when he said he did the homework and I didn't verify online until we were so far gone in the semester it was too late. He seems to have a lack of motivation and says school is boring and I want to just apply my foot to his backside. But this is the kid who shuts down or lashes out when confronted. Like when I caught him in a lie about his French homework he suddenly comes home (the week before finals) and announces he wants to drop French, how much it hoovers and he hates it. WHAT?! So you've invested a year and a half in this foreign language and NOW you've decided you don't want to take it anymore... uh huh. And the class he failed? Chemistry. Mostly because he didn't turn in the homework. And such is the story for all his other classes where he just blew stuff off, or did the homework but didn't turn it in. GAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!</p><p></p><p>This is a kid with a reasonably above average IQ. He is his own worst enemy. We got his PSAT results, which were disappointing. And I was thinking last month of enrolling him in an SAT prep class this spring, but now after this dismal semester, I'm wondering why bother? And then I feel guilty for thinking that way! But all he wants to do is play Xbox with difficult child 2 or go to lacrosse practice. No motivation to get a job this summer because "I'm not done being a kid yet, mom." He turns 18 in 7 months. No interest in thinking about college or career. No interest in dating. No social life outside of lunchtime at school or lacrosse. I'm scared to think about him being 25 years old and still living at home because I can't get him to get out there and take chances.</p><p></p><p>And I'm burned out with difficult child 2's issues at school. The moron math teacher who figured humiliation was the best way to get him to stay awake in class because she couldn't be bothered with reading his IEP which would TELL her that this is something he struggles with and it's not something he's doing intentionally. The immature water polo coach who has his own special brand of bullying and singling out difficult child 2 so that the environment for his peers continuing to harass him is juuuust perfect. And difficult child 2 is famous for doing work, but forgetting to turn it in. He dug out about 50 pages of work that he'd filed in his completed work box at home that had never been turned in! It's a miracle he didn't fail any classes this semester, but his grades aren't exactly stellar either.</p><p></p><p>And even easy child this semester had missed assignments and her grades dropped. She was my one consistent source of parental pride and delight. I guess it was a good run, considering she's almost a teenager.</p><p></p><p>So now I'm forced to be the heavy and starting Monday everyone's on a very tight leash. easy child protests the loudest because she's not used to having restrictions because she's always been an A student and always got all her work done. I reminded her that even SHE slacked off. I told them all to really enjoy their video games this weekend because they were going away.</p><p></p><p>husband is now off Paxil and on Lamictal, and I'm seeing improvements in his mood and reduction in reactivity and negativity. He's helping out around the house more and trying to be more involved with the kids. So that's a good thing. But his job commute is still a huge drain and we are back in debt again thanks to unexpected expenses and no savings to really bail us out thanks to the huge difference in pay at this job compared to the one he lost. Of course, my angry decision to book the trip to New Orleans for next month after difficult child 2 put his foot through my wall isn't going to help with the budget, but I was/am just so tired of postponing everything because of other people's problems. And with all the difficult child issues to deal with there's just no way I can see me getting a job yet. Just when I think things are going well... </p><p></p><p>I know things could be much worse, but I just feel so incredibly frustrated and disappointed with everything right now and my glass is looking very half-empty.:2dissapointed:</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 503266, member: 3444"] Slept for about 3 hours last night and finally gave up after tossing and turning for an hour and came downstairs at 5am. All I could think about is how much I feel like I'm failing because difficult child 1 fell flat on his face this semester. I don't know that there's any one reason his grades dropped and for the first time he actually FAILED a class. Maybe because I didn't hover, I believed him when he said he did the homework and I didn't verify online until we were so far gone in the semester it was too late. He seems to have a lack of motivation and says school is boring and I want to just apply my foot to his backside. But this is the kid who shuts down or lashes out when confronted. Like when I caught him in a lie about his French homework he suddenly comes home (the week before finals) and announces he wants to drop French, how much it hoovers and he hates it. WHAT?! So you've invested a year and a half in this foreign language and NOW you've decided you don't want to take it anymore... uh huh. And the class he failed? Chemistry. Mostly because he didn't turn in the homework. And such is the story for all his other classes where he just blew stuff off, or did the homework but didn't turn it in. GAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!! This is a kid with a reasonably above average IQ. He is his own worst enemy. We got his PSAT results, which were disappointing. And I was thinking last month of enrolling him in an SAT prep class this spring, but now after this dismal semester, I'm wondering why bother? And then I feel guilty for thinking that way! But all he wants to do is play Xbox with difficult child 2 or go to lacrosse practice. No motivation to get a job this summer because "I'm not done being a kid yet, mom." He turns 18 in 7 months. No interest in thinking about college or career. No interest in dating. No social life outside of lunchtime at school or lacrosse. I'm scared to think about him being 25 years old and still living at home because I can't get him to get out there and take chances. And I'm burned out with difficult child 2's issues at school. The moron math teacher who figured humiliation was the best way to get him to stay awake in class because she couldn't be bothered with reading his IEP which would TELL her that this is something he struggles with and it's not something he's doing intentionally. The immature water polo coach who has his own special brand of bullying and singling out difficult child 2 so that the environment for his peers continuing to harass him is juuuust perfect. And difficult child 2 is famous for doing work, but forgetting to turn it in. He dug out about 50 pages of work that he'd filed in his completed work box at home that had never been turned in! It's a miracle he didn't fail any classes this semester, but his grades aren't exactly stellar either. And even easy child this semester had missed assignments and her grades dropped. She was my one consistent source of parental pride and delight. I guess it was a good run, considering she's almost a teenager. So now I'm forced to be the heavy and starting Monday everyone's on a very tight leash. easy child protests the loudest because she's not used to having restrictions because she's always been an A student and always got all her work done. I reminded her that even SHE slacked off. I told them all to really enjoy their video games this weekend because they were going away. husband is now off Paxil and on Lamictal, and I'm seeing improvements in his mood and reduction in reactivity and negativity. He's helping out around the house more and trying to be more involved with the kids. So that's a good thing. But his job commute is still a huge drain and we are back in debt again thanks to unexpected expenses and no savings to really bail us out thanks to the huge difference in pay at this job compared to the one he lost. Of course, my angry decision to book the trip to New Orleans for next month after difficult child 2 put his foot through my wall isn't going to help with the budget, but I was/am just so tired of postponing everything because of other people's problems. And with all the difficult child issues to deal with there's just no way I can see me getting a job yet. Just when I think things are going well... I know things could be much worse, but I just feel so incredibly frustrated and disappointed with everything right now and my glass is looking very half-empty.:2dissapointed: [/QUOTE]
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