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Went to see counselor last night...
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 275814" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>I come from an Irish family where my Mom was one of eight siblings. My Mother and her eldest brother were the only ones who were not alcoholics but they married alcoholics. Everyone is the family led hardworking, honest, God-fearing lives. The happiest couples were those who were "in sync". When going on the wagon and hoping for an improved life, they were soon disillusioned.</p><p> </p><p>Alcoholics often don't have a clue how to communicate. Often they are terrific salespeople but they have numbed out the deeper levels of their lives and therefore they don't relate on a deep level with others. I know that is 100&#37; true in our extended family. It is also true in my marriage. Once my husband quit drinking he became more isolated and remote He would do anything for me. He loves me to death. I finally accepted that he can not provide the type of intimacy I hoped for. Furthermore, in my humble opinion once an alcoholic faces life without that crutch...he has to face more of his own warts than he is comfortable with. There is no "leftover" emotional strength for others. Years ago I did the "Dear Abby" or "Ann Landers" test in my head "would I be better off without him or with him". I opted to stay with him because he truly is a fine man. It was an adjustment. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 275814, member: 35"] I come from an Irish family where my Mom was one of eight siblings. My Mother and her eldest brother were the only ones who were not alcoholics but they married alcoholics. Everyone is the family led hardworking, honest, God-fearing lives. The happiest couples were those who were "in sync". When going on the wagon and hoping for an improved life, they were soon disillusioned. Alcoholics often don't have a clue how to communicate. Often they are terrific salespeople but they have numbed out the deeper levels of their lives and therefore they don't relate on a deep level with others. I know that is 100% true in our extended family. It is also true in my marriage. Once my husband quit drinking he became more isolated and remote He would do anything for me. He loves me to death. I finally accepted that he can not provide the type of intimacy I hoped for. Furthermore, in my humble opinion once an alcoholic faces life without that crutch...he has to face more of his own warts than he is comfortable with. There is no "leftover" emotional strength for others. Years ago I did the "Dear Abby" or "Ann Landers" test in my head "would I be better off without him or with him". I opted to stay with him because he truly is a fine man. It was an adjustment. DDD [/QUOTE]
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Went to see counselor last night...
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