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What are REAL relationships like?
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<blockquote data-quote="HaoZi" data-source="post: 566093"><p>I'm used to seeing/being in relationships that are closer to partnerships or where the woman does most of the decisions and the man does the heavy lifting. My Dad took care of everything (and I mean everything, from shopping and cleaning to finances and all the minor detail stuff) because Mom was in bad health and couldn't really do much, but you better believe she spoke her mind and would override him on stuff when she felt like it. Every now and then when he felt it was really warranted he would override her (when it came to how to raise me, mostly).</p><p></p><p>In both my previous marriages all the major decisions fell on me because my ex's just didn't want to be responsible for making the choice or didn't have the knowledge to decide financial matters, etc. In the first marriage I was also the main money-maker as well, though both expected me to do all the domestic stuff that I hate so much.</p><p></p><p>All of the men mentioned above had times when they would comfort and times when they felt it best to walk away from a crying woman or girl and let them sort it out for themselves or because they couldn't handle a crying woman (some men just get lost in that situation and don't know what to do).</p><p></p><p>The guy I'm with now will always try to comfort me with a hug first unless I signal to him that I need to be alone. He's very domestic (like my Dad) and I'm content to let him be domestic. I'm the one teaching him how to shop but he's not picky about what gets bought too much (he has his own place anyway, but he's here so much it's like he lives with us). We take turns dealing with Kiddo when she's in one of her nasty moods and he's great at keeping me on an even keel (which keeps the whole situation calmer). It's a true partnership all the way around. We take turns doing things. Some chores he doesn't mind and he does, others I don't mind and I do. Obviously our finances aren't combined but I have the feeling if we were one household we'd discuss the big purchases and also keep separate accounts for our own spending.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HaoZi, post: 566093"] I'm used to seeing/being in relationships that are closer to partnerships or where the woman does most of the decisions and the man does the heavy lifting. My Dad took care of everything (and I mean everything, from shopping and cleaning to finances and all the minor detail stuff) because Mom was in bad health and couldn't really do much, but you better believe she spoke her mind and would override him on stuff when she felt like it. Every now and then when he felt it was really warranted he would override her (when it came to how to raise me, mostly). In both my previous marriages all the major decisions fell on me because my ex's just didn't want to be responsible for making the choice or didn't have the knowledge to decide financial matters, etc. In the first marriage I was also the main money-maker as well, though both expected me to do all the domestic stuff that I hate so much. All of the men mentioned above had times when they would comfort and times when they felt it best to walk away from a crying woman or girl and let them sort it out for themselves or because they couldn't handle a crying woman (some men just get lost in that situation and don't know what to do). The guy I'm with now will always try to comfort me with a hug first unless I signal to him that I need to be alone. He's very domestic (like my Dad) and I'm content to let him be domestic. I'm the one teaching him how to shop but he's not picky about what gets bought too much (he has his own place anyway, but he's here so much it's like he lives with us). We take turns dealing with Kiddo when she's in one of her nasty moods and he's great at keeping me on an even keel (which keeps the whole situation calmer). It's a true partnership all the way around. We take turns doing things. Some chores he doesn't mind and he does, others I don't mind and I do. Obviously our finances aren't combined but I have the feeling if we were one household we'd discuss the big purchases and also keep separate accounts for our own spending. [/QUOTE]
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