What do you do for you?

[Jena]

Hi to everyone,

Let me just say it has helped me alot being here this past week or so. I can't go through a day without loggin on, sharing, reading, offering an ear now when i can. I am grateful to have found here, I was at the end of my rope.

So, this isn't about my daugther or what she did today.....it's about us the parents and a question i had and wanted to throw out to everyone. "What do you do for you?" to help relieve the stress, fill your cup back up even a little? so you can be a good Mom or Dad the next day?

I read alot lately, it brings me out of my reality. No one is there but me and the people in my book. I try to take a bubble bath on occassion but the only way it'll work is if it is during day. LOL... my little one has to have bathroom door open (for the light) bedtime's a ritual. so if i close door over it gets ugly. anyway that's what i do. i considered alcohol for a while but i'm not a big drinker.

what do you do to help you??

Jen

 

[mstang67chic]

:reading: :bath: :geek: (when I can) :cool-dog: help calm me down

I get out of the house as much as possible! LOL I would LOVE to be able to :beach: but I'm pretty land locked here and all of my lake contacts moved.

 

[timer lady]

I spend a great deal of time doing artwork, reading or just plain napping. It's so important to find a way during a difficult child day to recharge, if just for 20 minutes at a time.

Jen, good for you for finding that "me" time. That time to step away from the land of GFGdom & into a more adult realistic world.

 

[hearts and roses]

Bubble baths are nice, and can be relaxing without little fingers poking under the door, or like at my house it used to be grand pounding on the door for difficult child to be let in. No thank you.

On the Healthier side of coping: Getting outside and into nature helps me to destress the most. Walking in the woods, even if it's the small woods behind our home. Going out at night and staring up into the star studded skies and just staring at the moon. It helps me to realize how small we are and that "this too shall pass". Sometimes going for a drive on a beautiful day up into the mountains where we don't go often. Playing fetch with my dogs or just lying with them and petting them and feeling their warm little bodies next to my legs. Meeting a friend for coffee in the morning before work. Meeting a friend for a quick lunch. Reading is one of my favorite escapes! Listening to music as I drive alone somewhere...I love listening to music really really loud and H hates it so I sometimes with just find an excuse to hop into my car and go listen to loud music. Now I have a nano-ipod so I suppose I could walk and listen, but I like singing out loud because it feels like I'm venting in a healthy way.

The most unhealthiest ways of coping for me have been smoking cigarettes and maybe having 2 glasses of wine instead of one. But, IMVHO, if those are the worst I can do to cope, then I think the other stuff makes up for it.

Find something that brings you joy and happiness rather than simple calm.

For me, and in my opinion, counterbalancing the stress and anger and resentment of coping with a major difficult child require laughter, joy and happiness. I am calm when I'm reading because I'm escaping. But doing something fun that makes me laugh or feel joy really helps me to deal with the day to day stuff. There is a butterfly conservatory up in Mass that I love to visit. I could just sit there and watch the butterflies flutter all day long and never get bored of it. I love firework shows, funny movies, walking along the beach on a cold day.

Think about all the things you enjoyed BEFORE you were married and had a difficult child - then seek those things out and see if they still bring you joy. Often, we get so wrapped up in our difficult child lives that we forget.

 

[daralex]

I try to find ways to laugh - laughter really is the best medicine. It is so hard to be laughing when difficult child is sucking the ever loving life out of me! I'll rent a funny video, look up jokes on the internet, etc. Find a way to laugh - it is in those light hearted moments that you know you still can!
Dara

 

[SaraT]

My stress is usually helped just by watching 8yr old try to wrestle(sp) with a 95 lb dog. Sometimes kids can be the best entertainment! lol

 

[Hound dog]

Okay, so now everyone is gonna think I'm a little off. lol

But I play the Sims. I play every night from 9pm til I go to bed. I've been playing this computer game for the past, oh let's see...8 yrears. I can have my "perfect family" in my "perfect world" on the Sims or I can have as much drama and such as I can think up to laugh about. Loads of fun. Great stress releaver.

Note: I also don't watch tv much. Programing as gone straight downhill these past several years. I do read, but I'm picky and my fav author can only write so fast. lmao

 

[Star*]

I go to the shooting range.

I go for a walk (now alone - my dog is crippled)

I draw.

 

[Wiped Out]

For me it's exercise-it helps me to destress more than anything. Reading is another good one and so is mindless t.v.

 

[KitKat]

I ride my horse. He's a little (alot) psychotic, so if I don't have my wits about me I'm on the ground, literally. I bought him four years ago because I thought I might go around the bend with everything that was going on. I stable him at a friend's farm and they look after my youngest while I do that - he loves being around the horses anyway. I don't have an expensive horse, just a crazy one.

 

[RobinD]

Well I take 1 hour a day to watch my favorite soap days of our lives. Been watching for 25 yrs now. And I also make alot of time for online posting and chatting. As I don't get out much so I enjoy being online in my cyber world

 

[tiredmommy]

I volunteer a lot. It makes me feel like I still have something to offer and it helps me to appreciate everything I do have. I end up spending a ton of time with kids, so it helps me to have perspective on where Duckie is at. It also helps underscore that Duckie's issues are not my fault because the other kids and their parents seem to have respect for me.:irock:

 

[crazymama30]

I go to work and go to school. I also love to take the kids to school. It is so quiet after they are gone. Once a year my mom, my sister and I have a girls weekend on the Oregon Coast. We are set to go the middle of March!!! I can't wait. We stay in a condo on the beach and can sit on the back porch drink coffee, or something stronger, and watch the waves. It is great.

 

[Lostparent]

I do several different things.I buy one house or sometimes two a year and I fix them up with my husband.I love to play pool and darts and we have both here at home.I also go away with the girls or by myself once or twice a year.We are going to Miami for spring break.

 

[gcvmom]

I come here.

I go walking with a friend.

I see my therapist.

I talk to my mom.

I read.

I do yardwork (a year-round option where I live).

I play bunco once a month.

I have dinner with friends once a month.

I go to an early matinee movie while my difficult children are in school.

 

[Star*]

I told you it was ONLY recreational and relaxing. LOL -

 

[gcvmom]

Sweet! I need ta get me one a them!

 

[BusynMember]

I write a lot (have had four books e-pubbed already and the last one sold really well!). I like to read, especially mindless, happy romance books, medical thrillers and mysteries. I do have one soap I watch and American Idol, but not big on television. I work out each morning way before the world wakes up, and I like to visit my friends. I am starting to volunteer at a safety house for domestically abused women and their kids. I watch sports (although watching the Packer game last night was VERY STRESSFUL...lol).

 

[Star*]

MWM - what is epub and what have you written? :smiles:

 

[PersonalEnigma]

I guess for me it all depends on my mood. I love to read so escape into a good book is one. I like baths and when everyone is in bed I will take a nice hot bath with something scented in it. When I'm in a total vegging mood or I need to kick some b*** I like to play video games (but have to be careful as I have a history of getting addicted). I watch TV, especially my "regulars". The odd glass of wine or rum & coke is helpful at times, but that's pretty rare - I'd rather have a coffee or tea most days.

MidwestMom - I also like writing, children's stories actually (although I've several adult things started but not completed). Nothing published yet, but one of these days... I don't know how kids picture books would do to epublish, especially unillustrated. What do you write?