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What done means/meant to you?
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 130056" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Thanks for the replies everyone - I know it was hard, and I appreciate it. </p><p></p><p>I have been in such a state with difficult child. I dont' know if I could even post what 3 hours is like living with this kid. He never ever stops. You would think that the way he's been up until his fines were paid - if he could be like that all that time - he would keep being like that. Instead the night we got home from paying for his fines - he did some major snooping, broke into my stuff, and has been in contact with my x's family. </p><p></p><p>They've told him things that are of course lies - and yet in my own home I 'm being challenged and called a liar...no I'm being screamed at that I was finally caught in a lie, he FINALLY caught me. And then things in the house got destroyed while I was gone - the dogs are a wreck - and he is just happy as can be that I'm more miserable than dirt - because his "Dad" doesn't have anything to live for = and it's MY fault. </p><p></p><p>I've done the Dad and crazy x family talk- too many times for my own health to help him sort out his life. And now after all we do for him - I'm nothing more than a liar. Poor Dad - liar Mom. </p><p></p><p>Liar mom paid his fines, Liar mom has tried to help him get his life on track so he WON"T be out in the streets, Liar Mom pays for his clothes, his food, his books for school and fees for GED class, and I'm just too tired to go on about other ugly and very meaningless yet hurtful things he's said - BUT ONLY AFTER I plunked down nearly a grand to keep him out of jail. </p><p></p><p>Fact is - no group home wants him after they read his history and see how his anger affects others. So what did I do - I went to the USC psychiatry dept. and asked them for help with him TODAY. Yup - I'm mean old liar Mom. And once again - he's caught me - caught again doing something for him even though he's broken my heart. Even though everyone involved in his care says to just let him go to jail - and learn life there. </p><p></p><p>Sure - go back to jail, get out at 23 yo, with no education and no job skills at all. That's why I asked when you said no - and meant it. I just don't even want to go home anymore. I want it to be like it was - him in school, helps around the house, is nice to me, I deserve more than a day or two of that for being his Mom. </p><p></p><p>Thanks for listening - I think I'm done for a while. </p><p></p><p>Star<img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/whiteflag.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":whiteflag:" title="whiteflag :whiteflag:" data-shortname=":whiteflag:" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 130056, member: 4964"] Thanks for the replies everyone - I know it was hard, and I appreciate it. I have been in such a state with difficult child. I dont' know if I could even post what 3 hours is like living with this kid. He never ever stops. You would think that the way he's been up until his fines were paid - if he could be like that all that time - he would keep being like that. Instead the night we got home from paying for his fines - he did some major snooping, broke into my stuff, and has been in contact with my x's family. They've told him things that are of course lies - and yet in my own home I 'm being challenged and called a liar...no I'm being screamed at that I was finally caught in a lie, he FINALLY caught me. And then things in the house got destroyed while I was gone - the dogs are a wreck - and he is just happy as can be that I'm more miserable than dirt - because his "Dad" doesn't have anything to live for = and it's MY fault. I've done the Dad and crazy x family talk- too many times for my own health to help him sort out his life. And now after all we do for him - I'm nothing more than a liar. Poor Dad - liar Mom. Liar mom paid his fines, Liar mom has tried to help him get his life on track so he WON"T be out in the streets, Liar Mom pays for his clothes, his food, his books for school and fees for GED class, and I'm just too tired to go on about other ugly and very meaningless yet hurtful things he's said - BUT ONLY AFTER I plunked down nearly a grand to keep him out of jail. Fact is - no group home wants him after they read his history and see how his anger affects others. So what did I do - I went to the USC psychiatry dept. and asked them for help with him TODAY. Yup - I'm mean old liar Mom. And once again - he's caught me - caught again doing something for him even though he's broken my heart. Even though everyone involved in his care says to just let him go to jail - and learn life there. Sure - go back to jail, get out at 23 yo, with no education and no job skills at all. That's why I asked when you said no - and meant it. I just don't even want to go home anymore. I want it to be like it was - him in school, helps around the house, is nice to me, I deserve more than a day or two of that for being his Mom. Thanks for listening - I think I'm done for a while. Star:whiteflag: [/QUOTE]
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