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What is the best way to take away the video games for a 17-year-old?
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 501497" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>When you find out, let me know.</p><p></p><p>In the meantime - the best we have managed, is to teach them to self-monitor. Ask the kid to set his own limits. Ask him how long HE thinks is reasonable to spend each day on computer games. When we did this with difficult child 1, he set what he thought was a very generous limit but was in fact a very unrealistic underestimate of his daily gaming time.</p><p></p><p>And we held him to it. That is when he realised how much time he was losing in games.</p><p></p><p>What we have done with difficult child 3 - keep a log book, let him play as much as he wants but make him sign in and out when gaming. Also quietly keep your own log, so you can verify he is logging all his gaming hours.</p><p></p><p>Also try to record what else he does (if anything). Then after a week, sit him down and discuss the evidence. That way it's not your word against his, it's evidence on paper. He needs to recognise the extent of the problem and to then be part of the solution.</p><p></p><p>But we have found, especially with our spectrum kids, that gaming seems to be a coping strategy. And when you begin to interfere with their coping strategies, all purgatory breaks loose.</p><p></p><p>What is normal - goes out the window. Do not let other people tell you things like "At his age he should be..." or whatever. With spectrum kids, the calendar does not apply.</p><p></p><p>This afternoon I said to a friend, "I've asked people to come here..."</p><p>Friend said, "With the state your house is in?"</p><p>"I know," I said, "But I've asked difficult child 3 to get the NERF out of the living room. Although he bought a new NERF toy today."</p><p>"He's going to be 18 in two days!" she said.</p><p>"Since when has that made any difference?" I had to remind her. </p><p>I could hear the shrug down the phone.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 501497, member: 1991"] When you find out, let me know. In the meantime - the best we have managed, is to teach them to self-monitor. Ask the kid to set his own limits. Ask him how long HE thinks is reasonable to spend each day on computer games. When we did this with difficult child 1, he set what he thought was a very generous limit but was in fact a very unrealistic underestimate of his daily gaming time. And we held him to it. That is when he realised how much time he was losing in games. What we have done with difficult child 3 - keep a log book, let him play as much as he wants but make him sign in and out when gaming. Also quietly keep your own log, so you can verify he is logging all his gaming hours. Also try to record what else he does (if anything). Then after a week, sit him down and discuss the evidence. That way it's not your word against his, it's evidence on paper. He needs to recognise the extent of the problem and to then be part of the solution. But we have found, especially with our spectrum kids, that gaming seems to be a coping strategy. And when you begin to interfere with their coping strategies, all purgatory breaks loose. What is normal - goes out the window. Do not let other people tell you things like "At his age he should be..." or whatever. With spectrum kids, the calendar does not apply. This afternoon I said to a friend, "I've asked people to come here..." Friend said, "With the state your house is in?" "I know," I said, "But I've asked difficult child 3 to get the NERF out of the living room. Although he bought a new NERF toy today." "He's going to be 18 in two days!" she said. "Since when has that made any difference?" I had to remind her. I could hear the shrug down the phone. Marg [/QUOTE]
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What is the best way to take away the video games for a 17-year-old?
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