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What should I do? Punishment
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 566624" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>I totally understand where you are coming from (been there done that!!)....but - </p><p></p><p>This is not healthy for YOU.</p><p></p><p>You really need to take a deep breath and take a step back. This is LAUNDRY. Admit it, in your wildest imagination, there was never once a time in your life when you figured you'd be willing to battle to the death over a laundry basket full of clothing. And yet....?</p><p></p><p>I know - it's the little stuff that finally breaks you....those day to day, mind-numbingly tedious tasks, that gosh-darn it shouldn't be so hard and why couldn't difficult child for once just do what they are supposed to do and let us all get on with our life???? ARRGGHH!!!</p><p></p><p>But once again - in the big picture, it is just laundry.</p><p></p><p>If I may offer some advice: I think you need to sit down by yourself and really decide what you want in your home. This is not about "punishing" difficult child...or "one-upping" difficult child...or showing her once and for all who is boss. You need to disengage from those kinds of battles - for your own sake.</p><p></p><p>You need to start maming decisions based upon what is best for YOU. And let me tell ya - going 20 rounds over laundry is not it.</p><p></p><p>In my own home, we also had a laundry issue. In our case, difficult child would leave all kinds of stuff in her clothes...and it would end up damaging other people's clothing. I would find bobby pins, needles, safety pins, makeup (tubes of lipstick and mascara - ugh!), candy, gum, magic markers, etc that had gone through the wash. One time, she even tried to dye a shirt black by adding color to the fabric and just slipping the shirt in with the rest of the laundry. Ugh! I was so angry and aggravated. Plus - difficult child was not showering or changing her clothes regularly. The items that finally made it into her hamper reeked and were stiff with body soils. It was enough to make one gag!</p><p></p><p>Finally, I had enough. For my own sanity - difficult child had to start doing her own laundry....<em>at the laundromat</em>. I even gave her laundry money! If it meant I could avoid the weekly laundry games (and potential damage to my washing machine)...then a roll of quarters every week was more than worth it. </p><p></p><p>That is the sort of strategy that could possibly help relieve some of your day-to-day stress...</p><p></p><p>As far as the cutting / choking and other dangerous things your girls are doing? Don't let that slide! If difficult child is hurting your easy child you need to call 911. If a child is hurting herself - make sure that her therapists are aware of it. If someone is threatening suicide? Call 911. THESE are the issues you need to be willing to "battle to the death".</p><p></p><p>Everything else is just stuff...</p><p></p><p>Many (((hugs)))</p><p></p><p>Please take care of YOU.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 566624, member: 6546"] I totally understand where you are coming from (been there done that!!)....but - This is not healthy for YOU. You really need to take a deep breath and take a step back. This is LAUNDRY. Admit it, in your wildest imagination, there was never once a time in your life when you figured you'd be willing to battle to the death over a laundry basket full of clothing. And yet....? I know - it's the little stuff that finally breaks you....those day to day, mind-numbingly tedious tasks, that gosh-darn it shouldn't be so hard and why couldn't difficult child for once just do what they are supposed to do and let us all get on with our life???? ARRGGHH!!! But once again - in the big picture, it is just laundry. If I may offer some advice: I think you need to sit down by yourself and really decide what you want in your home. This is not about "punishing" difficult child...or "one-upping" difficult child...or showing her once and for all who is boss. You need to disengage from those kinds of battles - for your own sake. You need to start maming decisions based upon what is best for YOU. And let me tell ya - going 20 rounds over laundry is not it. In my own home, we also had a laundry issue. In our case, difficult child would leave all kinds of stuff in her clothes...and it would end up damaging other people's clothing. I would find bobby pins, needles, safety pins, makeup (tubes of lipstick and mascara - ugh!), candy, gum, magic markers, etc that had gone through the wash. One time, she even tried to dye a shirt black by adding color to the fabric and just slipping the shirt in with the rest of the laundry. Ugh! I was so angry and aggravated. Plus - difficult child was not showering or changing her clothes regularly. The items that finally made it into her hamper reeked and were stiff with body soils. It was enough to make one gag! Finally, I had enough. For my own sanity - difficult child had to start doing her own laundry....[I]at the laundromat[/I]. I even gave her laundry money! If it meant I could avoid the weekly laundry games (and potential damage to my washing machine)...then a roll of quarters every week was more than worth it. That is the sort of strategy that could possibly help relieve some of your day-to-day stress... As far as the cutting / choking and other dangerous things your girls are doing? Don't let that slide! If difficult child is hurting your easy child you need to call 911. If a child is hurting herself - make sure that her therapists are aware of it. If someone is threatening suicide? Call 911. THESE are the issues you need to be willing to "battle to the death". Everything else is just stuff... Many (((hugs))) Please take care of YOU. [/QUOTE]
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