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what should I do with H & closure
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<blockquote data-quote="nvts" data-source="post: 184746" data-attributes="member: 3814"><p>H. could not stand my parents - I know she would not want them rifling through her things. - Steely</p><p> </p><p>Ok, I'm going out here on a limb. I know that most are saying that it's very personal and that "stuff" doesn't mean a connection to H. But the line above screamed out at me. I know that you've said before that H. didn't like them and that you'd been abused. Maybe you're playing with the idea of going so that you can have your moment of not feeling bullied and standing up to them on behalf of both you AND H. </p><p> </p><p>Personal opinion: I think you should go. I think you should pick and rifle and dig to your hearts content. I think you should revel in the things that brought H. pleasure. I think that you need to look the partner right square in the eye and assess how YOU feel about her. You've suspected her of helping H. down a slippery slope, now may be the last time that you can sit back and settle those feelings. I think that you should be able to finalize the "what goes where" for H's. things, keeping what you want and donating what you DON'T want the parents or partner to have.</p><p> </p><p>Take all of the other components going on in your life and "basket C" them until you've made up your mind on this issue. The BS at work will still be there on Monday whether you go to Oregon or not, so that doesn't need to come into play.</p><p> </p><p>Screw everyone else and everything else and decide based on what's right for solely you. No one else, just you.</p><p> </p><p>No matter what you decide, I'm here and we ALL love ya!</p><p> </p><p>Beth</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="nvts, post: 184746, member: 3814"] H. could not stand my parents - I know she would not want them rifling through her things. - Steely Ok, I'm going out here on a limb. I know that most are saying that it's very personal and that "stuff" doesn't mean a connection to H. But the line above screamed out at me. I know that you've said before that H. didn't like them and that you'd been abused. Maybe you're playing with the idea of going so that you can have your moment of not feeling bullied and standing up to them on behalf of both you AND H. Personal opinion: I think you should go. I think you should pick and rifle and dig to your hearts content. I think you should revel in the things that brought H. pleasure. I think that you need to look the partner right square in the eye and assess how YOU feel about her. You've suspected her of helping H. down a slippery slope, now may be the last time that you can sit back and settle those feelings. I think that you should be able to finalize the "what goes where" for H's. things, keeping what you want and donating what you DON'T want the parents or partner to have. Take all of the other components going on in your life and "basket C" them until you've made up your mind on this issue. The BS at work will still be there on Monday whether you go to Oregon or not, so that doesn't need to come into play. Screw everyone else and everything else and decide based on what's right for solely you. No one else, just you. No matter what you decide, I'm here and we ALL love ya! Beth [/QUOTE]
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