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what should I have done??
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<blockquote data-quote="amy1129" data-source="post: 434710" data-attributes="member: 11795"><p>again, you guys are great with the advice, suggestions and your stories. I cry everytime I read your responses and I dont know if its cause I am scared or just knowing that I am not alone. Either way I cant thank you enough.</p><p> </p><p>Everytime my son has an episode, my mind goes mushy, I think what should I do now, what would the social worker say to do, what should I not do right now? I feel like I dont know my son anymore even though he hasnt really changed at all. Maybe its me I dont know anymore. Between trying to "do the right thing" with my son and keeping my cool while he is exploding, yet keeping the boundaires and rules I have in my house, its hard to know what to do and when to do it and how to do it. </p><p> </p><p>I have noticed that he is not consistant with his tantrums, He reacts differently to the same situation, sometimes he doesnt even throw a tantrum. But I can tell when he is going to explode by his prior actions/mood and I try to approach him with caution but that brings me back to the point of I feel like I am giving in to him and he is getting what he wants and constantly walking on egg shells around him.....my social worker begs to differ here, she says he is not intentionally doing this to get what he wants, he is too young to figure this out. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>by the way Saturday was better but the night was horrible. He worked in the yard with dad all day, and me a easy child (which I am starting to think she is not so perfect) went shopping and had fun. So the plan was to grill burgers and go out for ice cream, but stupid me forgot to buy hanburgers and it was too late to cook anything so we decided to go to Chili's and then out to ice cream. Well I knew this wasnt going to be pretty so I approached it with caution, like saying they could get a soda at the restaurant, easy child child was all over it. Not him.....he threw his socks and sneakers at me and I just ignored him, continued to say, this is the plan lets take a shower and get ready. he did all that I asked, yelling and growling all the way. We got to the Chilis and he was much better. they ate, got their soda etc. Then I think the soda got them all crazy cause they were beyond silly......got their ice cream and headed home. hubby asked easy child to help him with the pool cover and they went out side to do that and son got so bent out of shape that daddy doesnt let me do anything, he thinks I am stupid, he hates me, why does easy child get to help him....i want to do it.....screaming and throwing clothes etc. I ignored him to the best of my abilities, but windows are open and lots of people outside. I tried to explain to him that easy child was bigger and more able to help daddy, that you were helping daddy all day, its easy child's turn, and your naked right you cant go outside naked (in a funny voice trying to see if he would see that and laugh with me) but that just fueled him. our puppy gets concerned when kids are crying so he always goes and checks out the crying child and licks their faces, well difficult child apparently hates that and pushes and yells at the dogs, i hate you ______, get away from me or I am going to punch you.....I immediately got in difficult child's face and said actually yelled dont you ever touch that dog, if you do you will be grounded for a week. he got my point and ran to his room and cried. came out still naked with pj's in hand. we all ignored him until he got dressed then was ****** when he asked for a snack and I said you know the rules, no snacks after 9pm, another tantrum.....i couldnt take it anymore and put him to bed. Sunday was pleasantly a good day, with 2 minor and quick tantrums. </p><p> </p><p>Phew, I think I need you guys on speed dial to get advice on things as they are happening. </p><p> </p><p>Oh have any of you taken video of the kids doing what they do? I have thought about it because like I said, no one believes me when I tell them these stories.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="amy1129, post: 434710, member: 11795"] again, you guys are great with the advice, suggestions and your stories. I cry everytime I read your responses and I dont know if its cause I am scared or just knowing that I am not alone. Either way I cant thank you enough. Everytime my son has an episode, my mind goes mushy, I think what should I do now, what would the social worker say to do, what should I not do right now? I feel like I dont know my son anymore even though he hasnt really changed at all. Maybe its me I dont know anymore. Between trying to "do the right thing" with my son and keeping my cool while he is exploding, yet keeping the boundaires and rules I have in my house, its hard to know what to do and when to do it and how to do it. I have noticed that he is not consistant with his tantrums, He reacts differently to the same situation, sometimes he doesnt even throw a tantrum. But I can tell when he is going to explode by his prior actions/mood and I try to approach him with caution but that brings me back to the point of I feel like I am giving in to him and he is getting what he wants and constantly walking on egg shells around him.....my social worker begs to differ here, she says he is not intentionally doing this to get what he wants, he is too young to figure this out. by the way Saturday was better but the night was horrible. He worked in the yard with dad all day, and me a easy child (which I am starting to think she is not so perfect) went shopping and had fun. So the plan was to grill burgers and go out for ice cream, but stupid me forgot to buy hanburgers and it was too late to cook anything so we decided to go to Chili's and then out to ice cream. Well I knew this wasnt going to be pretty so I approached it with caution, like saying they could get a soda at the restaurant, easy child child was all over it. Not him.....he threw his socks and sneakers at me and I just ignored him, continued to say, this is the plan lets take a shower and get ready. he did all that I asked, yelling and growling all the way. We got to the Chilis and he was much better. they ate, got their soda etc. Then I think the soda got them all crazy cause they were beyond silly......got their ice cream and headed home. hubby asked easy child to help him with the pool cover and they went out side to do that and son got so bent out of shape that daddy doesnt let me do anything, he thinks I am stupid, he hates me, why does easy child get to help him....i want to do it.....screaming and throwing clothes etc. I ignored him to the best of my abilities, but windows are open and lots of people outside. I tried to explain to him that easy child was bigger and more able to help daddy, that you were helping daddy all day, its easy child's turn, and your naked right you cant go outside naked (in a funny voice trying to see if he would see that and laugh with me) but that just fueled him. our puppy gets concerned when kids are crying so he always goes and checks out the crying child and licks their faces, well difficult child apparently hates that and pushes and yells at the dogs, i hate you ______, get away from me or I am going to punch you.....I immediately got in difficult child's face and said actually yelled dont you ever touch that dog, if you do you will be grounded for a week. he got my point and ran to his room and cried. came out still naked with pj's in hand. we all ignored him until he got dressed then was ****** when he asked for a snack and I said you know the rules, no snacks after 9pm, another tantrum.....i couldnt take it anymore and put him to bed. Sunday was pleasantly a good day, with 2 minor and quick tantrums. Phew, I think I need you guys on speed dial to get advice on things as they are happening. Oh have any of you taken video of the kids doing what they do? I have thought about it because like I said, no one believes me when I tell them these stories. [/QUOTE]
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