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What to do during meltdowns
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<blockquote data-quote="buddy" data-source="post: 559114" data-attributes="member: 12886"><p>My son needed to be restrained too when young but now he is big. He has always felt it was for nothing after and will still say something about back then. It's a last resort for us even though deep pressure calms him...he does not have the underlying secure attachment to know he is safe when in that state.(had no choice when TVs were being tipped and things were being thrown at me or walls were being broken.....we rent.)</p><p></p><p>But the way we reduced it when he was young was through a combination of medications and early use of baths and getting Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers to take him out several times per week. Now if he reaches that level I tell him he has to go to.the hospital. And we do it. He just recently said no! No.hospital, I don't like it.......that is new. The last time there the doctor heard him threaten me so he said, " do you want a shot? " and wow did that work! So I think he fears a shot now. Who knew? </p><p></p><p>So really during I'd only restrain if there is going to be serious injury or damage and Id only say do it if trained. I was.trained in crisis prevention intervention CPI holds and really kids can be hurt and die if.lying down in a restraint. Arms can be twisted and broken easily. Some kids just don't feel the pain they should when in a rage. Adults do become emotional and it's easy to accidentally hurt them in a split second. </p><p>True you'd think she would stop if she was kicking a door? Mine will kick holes in it but he has always stopped short of hurting himself. He will also bang his head into walls. Every child is different and if she doesn't register pain or seeks intense stimulation she may accidently hurt herself. I just had to weigh options and have decided if that time comes I will then have to change strategies because preventing every possible time he bumps bangs kicks etc gives it toooooo much attention. The less upset and less attention I gave his rages the faster they went down. </p><p></p><p>If he was at all cooperative (again big risk if you aren't trained ) I rolled him in a blanket like a "hotdog " (head always out ) so I didnt have to hold him. Or put a weighted blanket on him in a rocking recliner. When really small I bounced him on a big exercise ball or rolled the ball on him. S ented cotton balls.calmed.himtoo. A battery operated vibrator on his shoulders or back (or foot massages) worked miracles sometimes as did swinging him in a home swing hung in our basement sensory room. He also would let me put a neoprene squish vest on him. </p><p></p><p>It's intensely mentally and physically exhausting. I hope as your bag of tools increases and you figure out more of the triggers (to avoid it in the first place ) you will experience less. If you can catch it earlier the above things work better of course. Oh big thing for us was to talk very very little. Not ignore but reduce all demands for processing. </p><p>Sorry this is disjointed, had to dig back to the earlier days .....</p><p></p><p>For us it comes and goes and is less frequently but a given episode can be much more intense just because his size is bigger so now safety has to include 911 if he doesn't calm. Oh another thing I can do now is leave my house. Could never do that until this year. I say we need a break from eachother and then say I'll be back at..... usually 15-20 min. If he blocks me I show him the cell and the emergency dialer. If he tries to grab my phone I will dial it....haven't had to do that yet but he knows I will. You are not there yet. I hope you never are.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="buddy, post: 559114, member: 12886"] My son needed to be restrained too when young but now he is big. He has always felt it was for nothing after and will still say something about back then. It's a last resort for us even though deep pressure calms him...he does not have the underlying secure attachment to know he is safe when in that state.(had no choice when TVs were being tipped and things were being thrown at me or walls were being broken.....we rent.) But the way we reduced it when he was young was through a combination of medications and early use of baths and getting Integrated Listening Systems (ILS) workers to take him out several times per week. Now if he reaches that level I tell him he has to go to.the hospital. And we do it. He just recently said no! No.hospital, I don't like it.......that is new. The last time there the doctor heard him threaten me so he said, " do you want a shot? " and wow did that work! So I think he fears a shot now. Who knew? So really during I'd only restrain if there is going to be serious injury or damage and Id only say do it if trained. I was.trained in crisis prevention intervention CPI holds and really kids can be hurt and die if.lying down in a restraint. Arms can be twisted and broken easily. Some kids just don't feel the pain they should when in a rage. Adults do become emotional and it's easy to accidentally hurt them in a split second. True you'd think she would stop if she was kicking a door? Mine will kick holes in it but he has always stopped short of hurting himself. He will also bang his head into walls. Every child is different and if she doesn't register pain or seeks intense stimulation she may accidently hurt herself. I just had to weigh options and have decided if that time comes I will then have to change strategies because preventing every possible time he bumps bangs kicks etc gives it toooooo much attention. The less upset and less attention I gave his rages the faster they went down. If he was at all cooperative (again big risk if you aren't trained ) I rolled him in a blanket like a "hotdog " (head always out ) so I didnt have to hold him. Or put a weighted blanket on him in a rocking recliner. When really small I bounced him on a big exercise ball or rolled the ball on him. S ented cotton balls.calmed.himtoo. A battery operated vibrator on his shoulders or back (or foot massages) worked miracles sometimes as did swinging him in a home swing hung in our basement sensory room. He also would let me put a neoprene squish vest on him. It's intensely mentally and physically exhausting. I hope as your bag of tools increases and you figure out more of the triggers (to avoid it in the first place ) you will experience less. If you can catch it earlier the above things work better of course. Oh big thing for us was to talk very very little. Not ignore but reduce all demands for processing. Sorry this is disjointed, had to dig back to the earlier days ..... For us it comes and goes and is less frequently but a given episode can be much more intense just because his size is bigger so now safety has to include 911 if he doesn't calm. Oh another thing I can do now is leave my house. Could never do that until this year. I say we need a break from eachother and then say I'll be back at..... usually 15-20 min. If he blocks me I show him the cell and the emergency dialer. If he tries to grab my phone I will dial it....haven't had to do that yet but he knows I will. You are not there yet. I hope you never are. [/QUOTE]
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