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What to do with FEAR!
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 618377" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>Fear is something I continue to work on and I believe it is my greatest limiting factor. </p><p></p><p>Fear of failure. Fear of being alone. Fear of someone I love being hurt or dying. Fear of being humiliated. Fear of not having enough.</p><p></p><p>As I have begun this hard work on myself over the past __ years (seems like all my life, actually!), I have been uncovering more and more as I peel back the layers. </p><p></p><p>Looking at myself in full living color was terrifying at first. I didn't want to, and that's one reason I focused so much on everybody else. </p><p>And then I had the disease (dis-ease---great word, meaning lack of ease, not at ease) of grandiosity. I thought I was Super-Person and could do all things. It was all or nothing thinking. Either I could do ANYTHING or I could do NOTHING. </p><p></p><p>Sound familiar? I am so like the alcoholics and addicts in my life that I love. It's the SAME STUFF.</p><p></p><p>Fear, when I am being honest, is at the heart of most of my dysfunction. It doesn't feel good, to be afraid. In fact, it feels so bad that I used to DO ANYTHING to avoid that feeling. I can imagine that my precious son takes anything he can get his hands on to stop the feeling. </p><p></p><p>Once I changed my attitude...and wow, that has been a process, I was able to just entertain the idea of not running from my fear, even if for just a minute or five. Just sitting with it. Just letting it flood through me. </p><p></p><p>And guess what? I didn't die. I didn't freak out. The monster I had been fearing as mostly in my mind. Feeling my fear has been a good first step for me and I am still in that step. I am powerless over my fear and I am working to accept it.</p><p></p><p>Now, next is turning it over. Turning my fear over to Someone who CAN deal with it and letting go of that. Letting go of the outcome. </p><p></p><p>That is now what I am working on. The first step is amazingly freeing. I imagine this next step will be even more freeing as I learn to live into it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 618377, member: 17542"] Fear is something I continue to work on and I believe it is my greatest limiting factor. Fear of failure. Fear of being alone. Fear of someone I love being hurt or dying. Fear of being humiliated. Fear of not having enough. As I have begun this hard work on myself over the past __ years (seems like all my life, actually!), I have been uncovering more and more as I peel back the layers. Looking at myself in full living color was terrifying at first. I didn't want to, and that's one reason I focused so much on everybody else. And then I had the disease (dis-ease---great word, meaning lack of ease, not at ease) of grandiosity. I thought I was Super-Person and could do all things. It was all or nothing thinking. Either I could do ANYTHING or I could do NOTHING. Sound familiar? I am so like the alcoholics and addicts in my life that I love. It's the SAME STUFF. Fear, when I am being honest, is at the heart of most of my dysfunction. It doesn't feel good, to be afraid. In fact, it feels so bad that I used to DO ANYTHING to avoid that feeling. I can imagine that my precious son takes anything he can get his hands on to stop the feeling. Once I changed my attitude...and wow, that has been a process, I was able to just entertain the idea of not running from my fear, even if for just a minute or five. Just sitting with it. Just letting it flood through me. And guess what? I didn't die. I didn't freak out. The monster I had been fearing as mostly in my mind. Feeling my fear has been a good first step for me and I am still in that step. I am powerless over my fear and I am working to accept it. Now, next is turning it over. Turning my fear over to Someone who CAN deal with it and letting go of that. Letting go of the outcome. That is now what I am working on. The first step is amazingly freeing. I imagine this next step will be even more freeing as I learn to live into it. [/QUOTE]
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