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"What's surprising is that we don't have a dozen kids"...
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 478086" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>Sadly I understand. Sure wish I didn't, lol. husband and I decided to share parenting of difficult child#1 because we knew he would not have any structure. As everyone here knows he's lived with us 24 years...not what we planned. difficult child#2 was such a needy little boy because we stuck to our guns and said we would co-parent her first "mistake" but should she choose to get pg again she would be on her own. It was very difficult only seeing difficult child#2 once a week and knowing he was not getting the nuturing he required. He ended up living with us for close to eight years before his biomom "reclaimed" him and he has gone down the tube as a result. When she purposely got pg again and had her daughter I finally drew a line. She is nine and I have never changed a diaper, babysat etc. I have been the emergency contact for schools etc and I invite her to come visit a few times a year...for about four hours at a shot.</p><p></p><p>There is no win/win in situations like this. Your husband has very valid concerns about financial security for the two of you. It doesn't seem like it's going to go on and on and on but one year slides into the next and sooner or later you see the handwriting on the wall. I have no advice but do try to see the picture as a long range one. Hugs DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 478086, member: 35"] Sadly I understand. Sure wish I didn't, lol. husband and I decided to share parenting of difficult child#1 because we knew he would not have any structure. As everyone here knows he's lived with us 24 years...not what we planned. difficult child#2 was such a needy little boy because we stuck to our guns and said we would co-parent her first "mistake" but should she choose to get pg again she would be on her own. It was very difficult only seeing difficult child#2 once a week and knowing he was not getting the nuturing he required. He ended up living with us for close to eight years before his biomom "reclaimed" him and he has gone down the tube as a result. When she purposely got pg again and had her daughter I finally drew a line. She is nine and I have never changed a diaper, babysat etc. I have been the emergency contact for schools etc and I invite her to come visit a few times a year...for about four hours at a shot. There is no win/win in situations like this. Your husband has very valid concerns about financial security for the two of you. It doesn't seem like it's going to go on and on and on but one year slides into the next and sooner or later you see the handwriting on the wall. I have no advice but do try to see the picture as a long range one. Hugs DDD [/QUOTE]
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"What's surprising is that we don't have a dozen kids"...
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