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When are we assuming too much?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 621635" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Any time you are on a support forum, you will get a variety of ideas and they are based on our experiences, the types of therapy that helped us, and our priorities. There will never be 100% concensus, but if we all respect this, then it is ok. We need everyone to contribute.</p><p></p><p>I take suicide threats so seriously that 36 is now very mindful of using that because I will and have hung up and called 911 to have somebody check in on him. I am not in Missouri so that is my option. When my daughter held a knife to her throat, I called 911 immediately. She was calm by the time the cops came, and I cried when they put her in handcuffs (they said for their own safety) and drove her to a psychiatric hospital. She was screaming and I was crying and it was horrible and to this day I don't know if she was serious and asking her about it she says she was not sure either.</p><p></p><p>If one of my kids sent me a suicidal threat, I'd call 911 and forward the threat to the police and ask for a well check on the person. And the woman with the daughter CAN call the cops and ask for a well visit just because she is worried.</p><p></p><p>But, and this was most apparent to me during 36s custody battle when he was so distraught suicide came up a lot until I finally called 911...there is absolutely nothing I could ever do to stop him from it. He can do it faster than a response team can get there if he really wants to. Sometimes 36 uses suicide to manipulate us, but I believe that if he had lost his son to his ex he would have totally gone off the deep end and if he hadn't killed himself...would he had gone after her???? I really didn't know.</p><p></p><p>But sadly I have had to accept that this could happen to 36 and in the end it one's own decision. At 14, at 19, at 20, at any age...suicide happens. It is probably the worst experience of the survivor's life (I have not gone through it thankfully, but it has to be brutal and guilt-invoking). Nobody here has said that suicide is nothing to be serious about either. But rather than calling the son who may be suicidal and wasting time, in my opinion it's better to call 911.</p><p></p><p></p><p>My disclaimer: Every single word and thought put down on this post is 100% my own opinion which you can laugh at, spit at, toss out, hate me for, love me for, think I'm wrong, think I'm right, etc. etc. etc. Never do any of us, I think, take the advice we get here and think, "OMG. I have to do it allo because Susie Smith said I do. I think it makes us think perhaps differently than before and gives us stuff to chew on. And I think our support is comforting. But I don't believe any of us are not able to think for ourselves. I now feel I have to post this discliamer every time...lolol <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> But, really, guys, my thoughts are my thoughts; nothing more, nothing less. And we are allowed to agree to disagree with respect.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 621635, member: 1550"] Any time you are on a support forum, you will get a variety of ideas and they are based on our experiences, the types of therapy that helped us, and our priorities. There will never be 100% concensus, but if we all respect this, then it is ok. We need everyone to contribute. I take suicide threats so seriously that 36 is now very mindful of using that because I will and have hung up and called 911 to have somebody check in on him. I am not in Missouri so that is my option. When my daughter held a knife to her throat, I called 911 immediately. She was calm by the time the cops came, and I cried when they put her in handcuffs (they said for their own safety) and drove her to a psychiatric hospital. She was screaming and I was crying and it was horrible and to this day I don't know if she was serious and asking her about it she says she was not sure either. If one of my kids sent me a suicidal threat, I'd call 911 and forward the threat to the police and ask for a well check on the person. And the woman with the daughter CAN call the cops and ask for a well visit just because she is worried. But, and this was most apparent to me during 36s custody battle when he was so distraught suicide came up a lot until I finally called 911...there is absolutely nothing I could ever do to stop him from it. He can do it faster than a response team can get there if he really wants to. Sometimes 36 uses suicide to manipulate us, but I believe that if he had lost his son to his ex he would have totally gone off the deep end and if he hadn't killed himself...would he had gone after her???? I really didn't know. But sadly I have had to accept that this could happen to 36 and in the end it one's own decision. At 14, at 19, at 20, at any age...suicide happens. It is probably the worst experience of the survivor's life (I have not gone through it thankfully, but it has to be brutal and guilt-invoking). Nobody here has said that suicide is nothing to be serious about either. But rather than calling the son who may be suicidal and wasting time, in my opinion it's better to call 911. My disclaimer: Every single word and thought put down on this post is 100% my own opinion which you can laugh at, spit at, toss out, hate me for, love me for, think I'm wrong, think I'm right, etc. etc. etc. Never do any of us, I think, take the advice we get here and think, "OMG. I have to do it allo because Susie Smith said I do. I think it makes us think perhaps differently than before and gives us stuff to chew on. And I think our support is comforting. But I don't believe any of us are not able to think for ourselves. I now feel I have to post this discliamer every time...lolol :) But, really, guys, my thoughts are my thoughts; nothing more, nothing less. And we are allowed to agree to disagree with respect. [/QUOTE]
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When are we assuming too much?
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