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Parent Emeritus
When are we assuming too much?
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 621661" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>I'm sure AA is not the answer for all. My one experience with AA was better. I had a boyfriend for a year who was in AA (it has been eighteen years now and we are in Facebook touch and he is still sober). His AA meetings were very helpful to him and informative and I often went with him. If somebody faltered, they were there to pick that person up, at least in this particular caring group.</p><p></p><p>But none of us are saying AA or NA is the only way our children can quit. We are saying the only way they can quit is if they WANT to quit. We can't make that happen. How they do it happens in different ways. My daughter quit without going to rehab, AA or anything because it was her time to quit. I couldn't make her do it. Nobody could. She had to. Patriot's Girl's daughter quit after hitting rock bottom and having a beloved child.</p><p></p><p>This board is not just about our adult children because they are adults. This board is mostly about accepting that we can not control our grown children's choices and also how to move on and live our own lives with peace and serenity in spite of the bad choices of our grown children. It's a board for us as much as for our adult children.It's a place for us to feel validated, serene and to learn that it is ok to be happy even while some of our adult children treat us like trash. It is learning that we are not our grown children and they are not us.</p><p></p><p>Disclaimer: This is just my own take on things and it is fine for anyone to disagree.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 621661, member: 1550"] I'm sure AA is not the answer for all. My one experience with AA was better. I had a boyfriend for a year who was in AA (it has been eighteen years now and we are in Facebook touch and he is still sober). His AA meetings were very helpful to him and informative and I often went with him. If somebody faltered, they were there to pick that person up, at least in this particular caring group. But none of us are saying AA or NA is the only way our children can quit. We are saying the only way they can quit is if they WANT to quit. We can't make that happen. How they do it happens in different ways. My daughter quit without going to rehab, AA or anything because it was her time to quit. I couldn't make her do it. Nobody could. She had to. Patriot's Girl's daughter quit after hitting rock bottom and having a beloved child. This board is not just about our adult children because they are adults. This board is mostly about accepting that we can not control our grown children's choices and also how to move on and live our own lives with peace and serenity in spite of the bad choices of our grown children. It's a board for us as much as for our adult children.It's a place for us to feel validated, serene and to learn that it is ok to be happy even while some of our adult children treat us like trash. It is learning that we are not our grown children and they are not us. Disclaimer: This is just my own take on things and it is fine for anyone to disagree. [/QUOTE]
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When are we assuming too much?
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