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Parent Emeritus
When are you morally obligated to give in?
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 658317" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>JulieAnn my son was a very tough nut to crack. After I started consistently saying no, it was like his full time job was to break me. And it worked several times. One day he texted me more than 250 times. He was homeless at that point on the street during the cold Christmas holidays in a city four hours away. Finally what got me to react that time was him saying his computer charge cord was broken and he had ten percent battery left. I caved. I would get really tough and stay tough and then he would come up with a new "thing" and I would cave again.</p><p></p><p>Finally, slowly, I was able once again to set new boundaries. This happened over and over until I got strong enough to stick to it. </p><p></p><p>So...to answer your question...it takes a while and usually they ramp up the drama and chaos again and again and we oblige them. Until finally we don't anymore. You will stop when you are sick and tired enough to stop and not one minute before. </p><p></p><p>Get ready and get tough. It is very hard to do with someone you love. If you cave in, that is understandable. This is the hardest stuff you will likely ever have to do in your life.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there. We are here for you.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 658317, member: 17542"] JulieAnn my son was a very tough nut to crack. After I started consistently saying no, it was like his full time job was to break me. And it worked several times. One day he texted me more than 250 times. He was homeless at that point on the street during the cold Christmas holidays in a city four hours away. Finally what got me to react that time was him saying his computer charge cord was broken and he had ten percent battery left. I caved. I would get really tough and stay tough and then he would come up with a new "thing" and I would cave again. Finally, slowly, I was able once again to set new boundaries. This happened over and over until I got strong enough to stick to it. So...to answer your question...it takes a while and usually they ramp up the drama and chaos again and again and we oblige them. Until finally we don't anymore. You will stop when you are sick and tired enough to stop and not one minute before. Get ready and get tough. It is very hard to do with someone you love. If you cave in, that is understandable. This is the hardest stuff you will likely ever have to do in your life. Hang in there. We are here for you. [/QUOTE]
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When are you morally obligated to give in?
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