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General Parenting
When foreign adoptions fail--Montana Ranch
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<blockquote data-quote="Star*" data-source="post: 114350" data-attributes="member: 4964"><p>Nancy, </p><p></p><p>WOW - you know I have often thought the same thing. And at one point I did tell my parents I wish they had just kept it to themselves. Mostly I think because knowing didn't make it better or worse - it just complicated things for me. </p><p></p><p>And I have wondered over the years if I had not been told but then found out later how I would feel, and what I think now is that I would have felt betrayed or hidden. </p><p></p><p>And yes - at her age (16) is about when I started to figure out that I was loved, no one was leaving me again, I wasn't going to be abandoned - but I still made poor choices and had NO idea why. </p><p></p><p>At 38 - I found some solace in therapy and hypno therapy. The attachment issues were there - whether I had been told or not. You somehow just know I think. </p><p></p><p>You are the Mom, you have been wonderful, you have stuck by her - and if there is any proof that it gets better for a Mom - I am it because now my Mom would tell you I am her heartbeat. She is my love. Wasn't always that way - but I'm so glad it is now. </p><p></p><p>Hugs</p><p>Star</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Star*, post: 114350, member: 4964"] Nancy, WOW - you know I have often thought the same thing. And at one point I did tell my parents I wish they had just kept it to themselves. Mostly I think because knowing didn't make it better or worse - it just complicated things for me. And I have wondered over the years if I had not been told but then found out later how I would feel, and what I think now is that I would have felt betrayed or hidden. And yes - at her age (16) is about when I started to figure out that I was loved, no one was leaving me again, I wasn't going to be abandoned - but I still made poor choices and had NO idea why. At 38 - I found some solace in therapy and hypno therapy. The attachment issues were there - whether I had been told or not. You somehow just know I think. You are the Mom, you have been wonderful, you have stuck by her - and if there is any proof that it gets better for a Mom - I am it because now my Mom would tell you I am her heartbeat. She is my love. Wasn't always that way - but I'm so glad it is now. Hugs Star [/QUOTE]
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When foreign adoptions fail--Montana Ranch
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