Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
When he wants to hug me...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="DammitJanet" data-source="post: 41658" data-attributes="member: 1514"><p>Allen...</p><p></p><p>Do you think there is ever a time for a parent being in complete control? For a parent to just say NO and having the final say? </p><p></p><p>Compromising on somethings is fine. I couldnt care less what my kids do with their hair, their clothing, or what they watch on tv. I didnt fight any of those battles and we had no problems there. Of course, I didnt have cable so tv was limited anyway.</p><p></p><p>I was content not to make the kid who hated onions eat onions. They could either pick them out or make a sandwich that night. No biggie. I wasnt a short order cook so they learned how to fix a sandwich quite early. </p><p></p><p>However, there are times that a parent does have to exert control and their word needs to be law and final. When a parent yells NO or STOP at a child running toward the street and cars are coming it is not the time to have a dialog about how they shouldnt run into the street or compromise about which bones they want to break! </p><p></p><p>The child should know to obey the parent and stop instantly for safety's sake alone. </p><p></p><p>I dont think there is any better way to teach a child how their actions effect other people than starting in the home. You seem to hate the word "discipline" but it means to teach. It is a parents responsibility to teach a child how to become productive in society. They must know that they cannot go out there and throw fits or break the laws because there are consequences to their actions. Other people are not going to accept a hug or an apology from them. They have to see that when they behave badly other people are effected and that their behavior brings negative consequences. That is the way the real world works! </p><p></p><p>By the way, I had just as hard a childhood as MWM and grew up bipolar. I know what it feels like to not know what was wrong with me and wonder why I acted the way I did. I was also abused in more ways than I can even go into here by mother. None of it means I get a free pass to act out in public. I had to learn to get along with society and not break the law and so do our kids. I didnt even get treatment until I was in my late 30s.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DammitJanet, post: 41658, member: 1514"] Allen... Do you think there is ever a time for a parent being in complete control? For a parent to just say NO and having the final say? Compromising on somethings is fine. I couldnt care less what my kids do with their hair, their clothing, or what they watch on tv. I didnt fight any of those battles and we had no problems there. Of course, I didnt have cable so tv was limited anyway. I was content not to make the kid who hated onions eat onions. They could either pick them out or make a sandwich that night. No biggie. I wasnt a short order cook so they learned how to fix a sandwich quite early. However, there are times that a parent does have to exert control and their word needs to be law and final. When a parent yells NO or STOP at a child running toward the street and cars are coming it is not the time to have a dialog about how they shouldnt run into the street or compromise about which bones they want to break! The child should know to obey the parent and stop instantly for safety's sake alone. I dont think there is any better way to teach a child how their actions effect other people than starting in the home. You seem to hate the word "discipline" but it means to teach. It is a parents responsibility to teach a child how to become productive in society. They must know that they cannot go out there and throw fits or break the laws because there are consequences to their actions. Other people are not going to accept a hug or an apology from them. They have to see that when they behave badly other people are effected and that their behavior brings negative consequences. That is the way the real world works! By the way, I had just as hard a childhood as MWM and grew up bipolar. I know what it feels like to not know what was wrong with me and wonder why I acted the way I did. I was also abused in more ways than I can even go into here by mother. None of it means I get a free pass to act out in public. I had to learn to get along with society and not break the law and so do our kids. I didnt even get treatment until I was in my late 30s. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
When he wants to hug me...
Top