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Parent Emeritus
When is it time to give up?
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 92233" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>MWM</p><p></p><p>Your situation with your son is somewhat similar to ours with stepgfg. She just waltzed out of our lives one day with the grandkids after all we did was attempt to help her and make her part of the family.</p><p></p><p>I was so devistated. It made no sense. The whole family was devistated.</p><p></p><p>For a few years following I tried searching for her.</p><p></p><p>Finally I reached a point that I realized I was just hurting myself more, causing more pain by trying to find her. She is perfectly capable of picking up a phone and calling. Our address has changed but the phone number is the same, and we're listed just so she CAN contact us if she ever feels the desire.</p><p></p><p>I came to accept that we can't force her to be part of our family. She made her decision. Her sibs loath her for what she did and how she did it. It still hurts when I let myself think about her and the kids. But the acceptance let me move forward.</p><p></p><p>I've made it as easy as possible for stepgfg to contact us if she ever wants to. That's all I can do. If I'd know where she was all along.....Well, I dunno what decision I'd have made. But even if I knew for sure where she is now, I wouldn't attempt contact. Took me a very very long time to get to that point.</p><p></p><p>Follow your heart on this one. It'll tell you what you need to do.</p><p></p><p>((((hugs))))</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 92233, member: 84"] MWM Your situation with your son is somewhat similar to ours with stepgfg. She just waltzed out of our lives one day with the grandkids after all we did was attempt to help her and make her part of the family. I was so devistated. It made no sense. The whole family was devistated. For a few years following I tried searching for her. Finally I reached a point that I realized I was just hurting myself more, causing more pain by trying to find her. She is perfectly capable of picking up a phone and calling. Our address has changed but the phone number is the same, and we're listed just so she CAN contact us if she ever feels the desire. I came to accept that we can't force her to be part of our family. She made her decision. Her sibs loath her for what she did and how she did it. It still hurts when I let myself think about her and the kids. But the acceptance let me move forward. I've made it as easy as possible for stepgfg to contact us if she ever wants to. That's all I can do. If I'd know where she was all along.....Well, I dunno what decision I'd have made. But even if I knew for sure where she is now, I wouldn't attempt contact. Took me a very very long time to get to that point. Follow your heart on this one. It'll tell you what you need to do. ((((hugs)))) [/QUOTE]
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When is it time to give up?
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