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Parent Emeritus
When is it time to give up?
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<blockquote data-quote="DDD" data-source="post: 92543" data-attributes="member: 35"><p>The influence of a wife can definitey trump the influence of a</p><p>Mother. I have detached from the son who was closest to me and</p><p>later to husband and me prior to his marriage. His wife is not evil</p><p>but she is very territorial. He is not evil (in fact, lol, he</p><p>has high moral values, is hardworking, bright and almost as much</p><p>fun as his Mom). He evidently can not figure out how to be attached to his family and also raise a family with his wife. We</p><p>have bowed out as gracefully as we can. Instead of the close</p><p>relationship we were used to, we see him a couple of times a year</p><p>and "sometimes" get a couple of calls. </p><p></p><p>Perhaps your son is similar to mine. He doesn't understand that</p><p>love multiplies as you share it so he sees it as a choice he should make. No doubt his wife encourages that philosophy.</p><p></p><p>I do understand your pain. I would not attribute the problem to</p><p>racial divide or to religious differences. As much as you love</p><p>him and admire his strengths, I think your son does not have the</p><p>intestinal fortitude to balance his loyalties. It is not your</p><p>fault. He isn't necessarily at fault either. He just can't do</p><p>it....or at least that is what I would guess. Hugs. DDD</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DDD, post: 92543, member: 35"] The influence of a wife can definitey trump the influence of a Mother. I have detached from the son who was closest to me and later to husband and me prior to his marriage. His wife is not evil but she is very territorial. He is not evil (in fact, lol, he has high moral values, is hardworking, bright and almost as much fun as his Mom). He evidently can not figure out how to be attached to his family and also raise a family with his wife. We have bowed out as gracefully as we can. Instead of the close relationship we were used to, we see him a couple of times a year and "sometimes" get a couple of calls. Perhaps your son is similar to mine. He doesn't understand that love multiplies as you share it so he sees it as a choice he should make. No doubt his wife encourages that philosophy. I do understand your pain. I would not attribute the problem to racial divide or to religious differences. As much as you love him and admire his strengths, I think your son does not have the intestinal fortitude to balance his loyalties. It is not your fault. He isn't necessarily at fault either. He just can't do it....or at least that is what I would guess. Hugs. DDD [/QUOTE]
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When is it time to give up?
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