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General Parenting
When no amount of discipline and rewards seem to work?
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 402551" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>You may want to investigate reactive attachment disorder. It will SOUND like lots of kids and disorders, but shoudl ONLY be diagnosis'd when there is significant trauma as a young child AND other disorders have been ruled out. It is an incredibly difficult problem to treat and the therapy requires much intense work by the child, parents and tdocs. Given the meth exposure and neglect/abuse from his mother, it IS a possibility. </p><p> </p><p>The neuropsychologist evaluation is crucial, in my humble opinion. It will tell you what is going on and that will tell you where to go from there. Given his behaviors, I would be reluctant to have him come home, personally. I am not sure I would feel safe, but that could be my own PTSD. Also he may try to lay abuse charges on you since they did work to get him out of the house even though he wasn't believed in the end. </p><p> </p><p>As far as all the poeple who talk with him and "reach an understanding", they are right. They DO reach an understanding, just not the one the adults think they reach. They reach the point where he understands what they want to hear to stop yammering at him and leave him alone and he says it so that they believe he means that he agrees with them and will "do better" from that point on. Seems like the adults need to reach the understanding that he is telling them what they want to hear with NO intention of actually DOING anything they want him to do. Pretty common in difficult children, sadly.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 402551, member: 1233"] You may want to investigate reactive attachment disorder. It will SOUND like lots of kids and disorders, but shoudl ONLY be diagnosis'd when there is significant trauma as a young child AND other disorders have been ruled out. It is an incredibly difficult problem to treat and the therapy requires much intense work by the child, parents and tdocs. Given the meth exposure and neglect/abuse from his mother, it IS a possibility. The neuropsychologist evaluation is crucial, in my humble opinion. It will tell you what is going on and that will tell you where to go from there. Given his behaviors, I would be reluctant to have him come home, personally. I am not sure I would feel safe, but that could be my own PTSD. Also he may try to lay abuse charges on you since they did work to get him out of the house even though he wasn't believed in the end. As far as all the poeple who talk with him and "reach an understanding", they are right. They DO reach an understanding, just not the one the adults think they reach. They reach the point where he understands what they want to hear to stop yammering at him and leave him alone and he says it so that they believe he means that he agrees with them and will "do better" from that point on. Seems like the adults need to reach the understanding that he is telling them what they want to hear with NO intention of actually DOING anything they want him to do. Pretty common in difficult children, sadly. [/QUOTE]
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When no amount of discipline and rewards seem to work?
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